have shut down the airport, unnamed sources have reported that some very valuable cargo has either been misplaced or stolen, the cargo in question as reported to MJ's was thought to be a container of balls, however it is now confirmed that the balls in question were not footballs, they are human balls i.e. testicles if anyone has come across a container with a Colt logo and approx. 112 testicles , please notify the authorities...

