Gone off to college, my gfs back home in Chicago 370 miles away @ community college... pretty much depressing.
anyone been in one of these before?
anyone been in one of these before?
long distance relationships blow.
- Thread starter tpaine07
- Start date
Yes. I was in Madison in undergrad while she was still in HS about a half-hour east of St. Paul. We made it last for a while, but eventually it just didn't work out. A lot of people I knew in undergrad tried to make similar relationships work, and only one succeeded (and she cheated on him at least once, which means she probably did many, many times that he doesn't know about).
A few of my new classmates here are trying to keep one going, as well. They aren't very optimistic. Not trying to be a downer, but while not impossible, this is the reality of trying to maintain long-distance relationships, especially if you're still in your early 20 (no idea how old you actually are, but I'm guessing about that if she's in school).
A few of my new classmates here are trying to keep one going, as well. They aren't very optimistic. Not trying to be a downer, but while not impossible, this is the reality of trying to maintain long-distance relationships, especially if you're still in your early 20 (no idea how old you actually are, but I'm guessing about that if she's in school).
here in the Boston area(with the way our traffic is) anything over 30 miles is a long distance relationship,...real pain in the ass to drive to my g/f's for an hour and a half during daylight hours (she lives 32 miles away) just to get layed,..so I only get layed at night now,...
Yea, im 20, we met right before I went away to play my 2nd year of junior hockey in Dubuque. We dated while I was there the whole year and thru this summer. She was only a 2 1/2 hour drive away there, so I'd come home and back on an off day, but I can't do that being this far away.
A French Airline Stewardess
A French Airline Stewardess
told me when i was 17 and all "hot and bothered" about my first big conquest..................""Every Relationship u ever have will end except the last one... learn from each and move on". I suggest u do the same.
A French Airline Stewardess
told me when i was 17 and all "hot and bothered" about my first big conquest..................""Every Relationship u ever have will end except the last one... learn from each and move on". I suggest u do the same.
Where are you at now? No matter what way you look at it, 370 miles is a hell of a lot.
Did/do you play in the USHL? Before I went to law school, I covered UW hockey for four years, so I covered a bunch of former USHL players.
Did/do you play in the USHL? Before I went to law school, I covered UW hockey for four years, so I covered a bunch of former USHL players.
Was in one for a long long time.
it is possible to make it work. ended up marrying the gal. and we did Japan to Milwaukee for a year, and then did Maryland to Milwaukee for another 4 years.
and then got hitched.
and we are still together even after 6 years together
so yes, it can be done. and we started it when i was 19/20
with today's technology, i dont understand how you can NOT make it work.
webcam, cell phone, all that shiznit.
we did it in 93-00 time frame and i was living in a fricking jailblock with phone calls costing $1.99 a minute so we wrote real pen and paper letters and stuck them in the mail. talk about pre-historic.
it is possible to make it work. ended up marrying the gal. and we did Japan to Milwaukee for a year, and then did Maryland to Milwaukee for another 4 years.
and then got hitched.
and we are still together even after 6 years together
so yes, it can be done. and we started it when i was 19/20
with today's technology, i dont understand how you can NOT make it work.
webcam, cell phone, all that shiznit.
we did it in 93-00 time frame and i was living in a fricking jailblock with phone calls costing $1.99 a minute so we wrote real pen and paper letters and stuck them in the mail. talk about pre-historic.
While i'm glad that marine had one that worked, that's the exception.
From personal experience and also the experiences of many others that i'm aware of, it will not work. Period.
From personal experience and also the experiences of many others that i'm aware of, it will not work. Period.
Im at Iowa State now playing (its d1 club, so nothing too special) Ah, I wish I was good enough to have played in the USHL... I just played in the CSHL for Grand Rapids then Cleveland my first year of Jr's and then in the MJHL last year for Dubuque.
Did you write articles in the paper or whatever for UW hockey or what exactly did you do? Pretty sweet gig though, they always have a great team.
Was in a couple in my younger years...always thought they would work out...never did.
I hate to be negative, but chances are very high it's over. Maybe not right now, but probably soon, and possibly before you actually know it. The longer you're apart the more you will change. It's inevitable, you are in college, and that's a time of growth, new experiences, etc. You aren't there to remain the same old person you were going in... You will not be the same person at the end of college that you were going in. She'll change in different ways than you, experience different things than you. One of you will very likely get bored and cheat on the other, or just lose interest in the other due to lack of contact. You may have good intentions now, but it's just not too realistic to expect you'll stay interested in each other in the same way when your lives are going in different directions. I wish you luck, but want you to be prepared for how this very likely will end. I've seen it happen a million times.
I hate to be negative, but chances are very high it's over. Maybe not right now, but probably soon, and possibly before you actually know it. The longer you're apart the more you will change. It's inevitable, you are in college, and that's a time of growth, new experiences, etc. You aren't there to remain the same old person you were going in... You will not be the same person at the end of college that you were going in. She'll change in different ways than you, experience different things than you. One of you will very likely get bored and cheat on the other, or just lose interest in the other due to lack of contact. You may have good intentions now, but it's just not too realistic to expect you'll stay interested in each other in the same way when your lives are going in different directions. I wish you luck, but want you to be prepared for how this very likely will end. I've seen it happen a million times.
She was in Florida and I live in Calif. It lasted 3 yrs. We got together at least every 4 weeks and it was like a honenmoon each time we got together. She was Dutch...(all Blond) and It lasted for awhile.....OMG !!!!
:scared
I have a boner just thinking about it.
I'm all for long distance relationships....
:scared
I have a boner just thinking about it.
I'm all for long distance relationships....
...............Update...
Well after approx 3 1/2 months away at school and 16 months dating total, we broke up. Im actually pretty depressed about the whole thing, but In my mind it was something I had to do. Im out here at college with pretty much no friends because im either coming home or shes coming up here on weekends. Thats no way to live your college years. When I am here on weekends, I don't really even go out because even If I were to befriend a girl, she'd go crazy if I hungout with her, even in a friendly way. My first college year was already ****ed up when I messed up my hamstring which has prevented me to play hockey out here. Anyways, Its time to move on and thats what I have the most problems with. We've had a few breakups before and I can never seem to feel good about everything and end up going back to her. She says she doesn't want too talk to me anymore, so I guess I have to live with that. We would talk ALL the time online and phone so it will be very hard.
Just thought i'd keep you guys updated since alot of you responded to my original post 3 months ago.
Well after approx 3 1/2 months away at school and 16 months dating total, we broke up. Im actually pretty depressed about the whole thing, but In my mind it was something I had to do. Im out here at college with pretty much no friends because im either coming home or shes coming up here on weekends. Thats no way to live your college years. When I am here on weekends, I don't really even go out because even If I were to befriend a girl, she'd go crazy if I hungout with her, even in a friendly way. My first college year was already ****ed up when I messed up my hamstring which has prevented me to play hockey out here. Anyways, Its time to move on and thats what I have the most problems with. We've had a few breakups before and I can never seem to feel good about everything and end up going back to her. She says she doesn't want too talk to me anymore, so I guess I have to live with that. We would talk ALL the time online and phone so it will be very hard.
Just thought i'd keep you guys updated since alot of you responded to my original post 3 months ago.
I wouldn't even try to date anyone outside the city limits of Los Angeles. I feel for you, though. Hope it doesn't have you too down.
yes..i went through this with my wife. i lived in nyc & she lived in quebec canada. i used to drive up to see her about once a month (9 hour drive). when i realized it was hurting my business (sales), we had to make a choice.....either end it or she move to nyc....which she did.
if you care about each other you can make it work.
good luck with whatever you decide.
i went through the same exact thing for about 2 years of school. Once we broke up and I got over being single again and not talking to her all the time I had the best time of my life my last 2 years of school. It may not seem like it now but you made the best move you could have made. Usually the right thing to do is the hardest. The best way to get over things is to cut off cold turkey, which it looks like she did. Believe it or not that's the best way to go...it just prolongs the inevitable if you keep talking, etc.
Things will get better hang in there.
Thanks man, Its glad to know someone was in the same situation as me. I know I did the right thing, its just super hard. I totally put myself in a hole here with not going out. Im probably one of the most social people around, yet ive imprisoned myself since I got here. Its hard to go cold turkey, I already made the mistake of telling her online I'd love to still talk to her, but she didn't really want any of that. I guess i'll just back off and try to get on with my life. Saint, did you do the same thing with not going out much or making friends with chicks while you were dating in college?
