puppies for sale

[Handi Capper]

don't venture in here much so if this is old story im sorry

young boy was selling puppies in outskirts of cincy, his sales pitch was they were democrats. a man came back to purchase two of them a week later, but the boy said they were republican puppies. the man, confused, said you told me last week they were democrat puppies, the boy replied "yes, but now thier eyes are open"

 

[Spytheweb]

How many republicans does it take 2 change a light bulb

How many republicans does it take 2 change a light bulb

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed;

2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed;

3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb;

4. One to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs;

5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb;

6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: Light Bulb Change Accomplished;

7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark;

8. One to viciously smear #7;

9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along;

10. And finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.

 

[smurphy]

don't venture in here much so if this is old story im sorry

young boy was selling puppies in outskirts of cincy, his sales pitch was they were democrats. a man came back to purchase two of them a week later, but the boy said they were republican puppies. the man, confused, said you told me last week they were democrat puppies, the boy replied "yes, but now thier eyes are open"

Good one, Ctownguy!

 

[Handi Capper]

Good one, Ctownguy!

:shrug:

isnt he on a 1 day self imposed ban

 

[smurphy]

It seems he has released himself on his own recognizance.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Spy, I love your posts and think that you contribute a great deal of insight. I am truly sorry for my idiotic posts attacking you. But I really have to ask, are you a frustrated patriot, or are you someone who truly hates America? It is a bit of a simple minded question, but I would really appreciate an answer.

 

[Jabberwocky]

btw Saul, I hope to have a chance to raise a wrist with you someday soon.


Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel.

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And Ren? Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.

 

[Agent 0659]

It seems he has released himself on his own recognizance.

:142smilie :142smilie :142smilie :142smilie

 

[Spytheweb]

Spy, I love your posts and think that you contribute a great deal of insight. I am truly sorry for my idiotic posts attacking you. But I really have to ask, are you a frustrated patriot, or are you someone who truly hates America? It is a bit of a simple minded question, but I would really appreciate an answer.

I don't like the way America does business. There are alot of great Americans who do alot of good things. There are just a few in high places that will bring this country down.

I'am like alot of Americans, i have kids, i have one who just finished college, the other is trying to go into the Air Force. I my self am a 20 yr USAF retiree.

I think this country is being shaped to have 2 classes, the rich and the working poor. Most jobs are paying the lease they can and everybody's cutting back on benefits, yet oil CEO's getting 400,000,000 dollar retirement packages.

We have people who we vote for and put in power who sell their votes to the highest bidder. Both Dems and Repubs, where are the real American heroes?

I also feel some in power want a North American union with no borders for Mexico and Canada, this will destroy our country. Dems and Repubs are the same but who else can you vote for?

I want someone who will do the right thing for all Americans, not just people who gave you money to get elected, or was your buddy in college, or for a business that will give you a job after you leave congress because you voted their way.

When i was growing up i had a whole different picture of America, what i'am seeing ain't pretty.

 

[Chadman]

Of the same vein...

Little kid got on the school bus today wearing a T-shirt with the slogan "Proud to be a Democrat." Bus driver asked why he was a Democrat and the kid said "Because my parents are Democrats."

"So," said the bus driver, "What if your parents were lying, biblethumping, perverted hypocrites? Then what?"

The kid replied: "Then we'd be Republicans."

 

[redsfann]

btw Saul, I hope to have a chance to raise a wrist with you someday soon.


Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel.

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And Ren? Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.

:mj07:

I minored in philosophy in college, funny chit!
Of the above mentioned here, I'd say my favs would be Nietzche and Hume followed closely by Kant....

 

[smurphy]

"Scooby Doo can doo doo,
but Jimmy Carter is smarter."

-Homer Simpson