Three female burglars, a redhead, brunette, and blond after seeing a nite watchman take refuge in the warehouse. They find burlap bags among the storage and decide to hide in them. The nite watchman checks the area and sees the three bags. Seeing movement, he kicks one lightly to see what is up...upon kicking the first bag (containing redhead) he heres a "Meowing" figures it must be a stray cat. He lightly kicks the second burlap bag (containing brunette) hears a "woof" "woof"...figures a stray dog. He moves on to the third sack (containing blonde) lightly kicks it and hears "Potato"...........
Dumb blond joke... (my wife says really dumb)
- Thread starter Dogphish
- Start date
A blonde called her boyfriend and said, "Please come over here and
help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how
to get it started."
Her boyfriend asked, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decided to go over and help with the puzzle. She let him
in and showed him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studied the pieces for a moment, then looked at the box, then
turned to her and said, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're
not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything
resembling a tiger."
He took her hand and said, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have
a nice cup of hot chocolate, and then............", he sighed, "Let's
put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how
to get it started."
Her boyfriend asked, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decided to go over and help with the puzzle. She let him
in and showed him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studied the pieces for a moment, then looked at the box, then
turned to her and said, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're
not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything
resembling a tiger."
He took her hand and said, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have
a nice cup of hot chocolate, and then............", he sighed, "Let's
put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
Not good at remembering jokes but someone posted this blonde joke here last year--don't remember who but thought it was one of best I heard. goes something like this--
Blonde walks into to Dr's office and complains of pains all over her body. She tell doc "it doesn't matter what area of my body I touch--arms legs,head ect I get an excruciating pain,please help.
Doc examines her for but 10 seconds and says he found the prob.
Wow she says that was fast--what is it?
he says--your fingers broke.
Blonde walks into to Dr's office and complains of pains all over her body. She tell doc "it doesn't matter what area of my body I touch--arms legs,head ect I get an excruciating pain,please help.
Doc examines her for but 10 seconds and says he found the prob.
Wow she says that was fast--what is it?
he says--your fingers broke.
One day this blonde walked into a store and said
"I`d like to buy that TV."
The salesman said "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde went home and dyed her hair red. She went back to
the store and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
"Sorry we don't sell to blondes." The man replied again.
She went and dyed her hair black, then returned to the store
and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
Again the man said "Sorry we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde finally asks "How did you know I was a blonde?"
The man said "Because that`s not a TV its a microwave."
"I`d like to buy that TV."
The salesman said "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde went home and dyed her hair red. She went back to
the store and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
"Sorry we don't sell to blondes." The man replied again.
She went and dyed her hair black, then returned to the store
and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
Again the man said "Sorry we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde finally asks "How did you know I was a blonde?"
The man said "Because that`s not a TV its a microwave."
A blonde., brunette and a redhead all pregnant are in the doctors office. The doctor ask them if they would like to know the sex of their babies. They all say yes. So the doctor ask what position were you in when the baby was concieved? The brunette says I was on my back. The doctor then tells her that she is going to have a boy. The redhead tells the doctor that she was on top. The doctor procedes to tell her that she will have a girl.The blonde burst out crying. When asked what was the matter? She replies I'm going to have puppies.
