> >ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
> >
> >Smart man + smart woman = romance
> >
> >Smart man + dumb woman = affair
> >
> >Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
> >
> >Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
> >
> > _____
> >
> >OFFICE ARITHMETIC
> >
> >Smart boss + smart employee = profit
> >
> >Smart boss + dumb employee = production
> >
> >Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
> >
> >Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
> >
> > _____
> >
> >SHOPPING MATH
> >
> >A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
> >
> >A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
> >
> >A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
> >
> >A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
> >
> >A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
> >
> >A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >HAPPINESS
> >
> >To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
> >little.
> >
> >
> >To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
> understand
> >her at all.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >LONGEVITY
> >
> >Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
> more
> >willing to die.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
> >
> >A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
> >
> >A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
> >
> >A woman has the last word in any argument.
> >
> >Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
> >
> >Old aunts and uncles used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the
> >ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I
started
> >doing the same thing to them at funerals.
> >
> >Smart man + smart woman = romance
> >
> >Smart man + dumb woman = affair
> >
> >Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
> >
> >Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
> >
> > _____
> >
> >OFFICE ARITHMETIC
> >
> >Smart boss + smart employee = profit
> >
> >Smart boss + dumb employee = production
> >
> >Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
> >
> >Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
> >
> > _____
> >
> >SHOPPING MATH
> >
> >A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
> >
> >A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
> >
> >A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
> >
> >A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
> >
> >A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
> >
> >A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >HAPPINESS
> >
> >To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
> >little.
> >
> >
> >To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
> understand
> >her at all.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >LONGEVITY
> >
> >Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
> more
> >willing to die.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
> >
> >A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
> >
> >A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
> >
> >A woman has the last word in any argument.
> >
> >Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
> >
> >
> > _____
> >
> >HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
> >
> >Old aunts and uncles used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the
> >ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I
started
> >doing the same thing to them at funerals.
