>How to shower
>
>
> HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN
>
>1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
> according to lights and darks.
>2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
> along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to
> do more sit-ups.
>4. Get in the shower.
>5. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and
> pumice stone.
>6. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
> with 43 added vitamins.
>7. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>8. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
> with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
>9. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
>red.
>10. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>11. Complain because your husband has been eating your ginger nut
> and Jaffa cake body wash.
>12. Rinse conditioner off hair.
>13. Shave armpits and legs.
>14. Turn off shower.
>15. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower and spray mold spots with
>Tilex.
>16. Get out of shower.
>17. Dry with towel the size of a small country and wrap hair in super
> absorbent towel.
>18. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs.
>19. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
>20. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN
>
>1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
> them in a pile.
>2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
> wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
> 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of
> your wiener and scratch your ass.
>4. Get in the shower.
>5. Wash your face.
>6. Wash your armpits.
>7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound
> in the shower.
> 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
>11. Shampoo your hair.
>12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>14. Pee.
>15. Rinse off and get out of shower.
>16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
>hanging
> out of tub the whole time.
>17. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>18. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your
> wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo sound
>again.
>20. Throw wet towel on bed.
>
>
> HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN
>
>1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
> according to lights and darks.
>2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
> along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to
> do more sit-ups.
>4. Get in the shower.
>5. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and
> pumice stone.
>6. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
> with 43 added vitamins.
>7. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>8. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
> with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
>9. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
>red.
>10. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>11. Complain because your husband has been eating your ginger nut
> and Jaffa cake body wash.
>12. Rinse conditioner off hair.
>13. Shave armpits and legs.
>14. Turn off shower.
>15. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower and spray mold spots with
>Tilex.
>16. Get out of shower.
>17. Dry with towel the size of a small country and wrap hair in super
> absorbent towel.
>18. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs.
>19. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
>20. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN
>
>1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
> them in a pile.
>2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
> wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
> 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of
> your wiener and scratch your ass.
>4. Get in the shower.
>5. Wash your face.
>6. Wash your armpits.
>7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound
> in the shower.
> 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
>11. Shampoo your hair.
>12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>14. Pee.
>15. Rinse off and get out of shower.
>16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
>hanging
> out of tub the whole time.
>17. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>18. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your
> wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo sound
>again.
>20. Throw wet towel on bed.
Excellent. 
