Men Are Like ...

[Justinsmom829]

>Men are like ... Laxatives: They irritate the crap out of you.
>
>Men are like ... Bananas: The older they get, the less firm they
are.
>
>Men are like ... Vacations: They never seem to last long enough.
>
>Men are like ... Weather: Nothing can be done to change them.
>
>Men are like ... Blenders: You need One, but you're not quite sure
why.
>
>Men are like ... Chocolate Bars: Sweet, smooth, & they usually head
>right for your hips.
>
>Men are like ... Coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, & can
>keep you up all night long.
>
>Men are like ... Commercials: You can't believe a word they say.
>
>Men are like ... Department Stores: Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
>
>Men are like ... Government Bonds: They take soooooooo long to mature.
>
>Men are like ... Mascara: They usually run at the first sign of
>emotion.
>
>Men are like ... Popcorn: They satisfy you, but only for a
>little while.
>
>Men are like ... Snowstorms: You never know when they're coming, how
many
>inches you'll get or how long it will last.
>
>Men are like ... Lava Lamps: Fun to look at, but not very bright.

 

[NickiD]

Lately I've been lucky ... mine is like the cup of coffee with a side of chocolate bar

 

[TBONEZ0295]

:lol: :thumb: :Yep: :clap:

 

[ajoytoy]

Understanding a Woman
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You want REALLY MEANS You want
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We need REALLY MEANS I want
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It's your decision REALLY MEANS The correct decision should be obvious by now.
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Do what you want REALLY MEANS You'll pay for this later.
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We need to talk REALLY MEANS I need to complain
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Sure... go ahead REALLY MEANS I don't want you to.
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I'm not upset REALLY MEANS Of course I'm upset, you moron!
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You're ... so manly REALLY MEANS You need a shave and you sweat a lot.
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You're certainly attentive tonight. REALLY MEANS Is sex all you ever think about?
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I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! REALLY MEANS I'm on my period.
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Be romantic, turn out the lights. REALLY MEANS I'm Embarrassed
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This kitchen is so inconvenient REALLY MEANS I want a new house.
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You have to learn to communicate. REALLY MEANS Just agree with me.
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Yes REALLY MEANS No | No REALLY MEANS No | Maybe REALLY MEANS No
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Hang the picture there REALLY MEANS NO, I mean hang it there!
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I heard a noise REALLY MEANS I noticed you were almost asleep.
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Do you love me? REALLY MEANS I'm going to ask for something expensive.
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How much do you love me? REALLY MEANS I did something today you're really not going to like.
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I'll be ready in a minute. REALLY MEANS Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.
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Am I a little fat? REALLY MEANS Tell me I'm beautiful.
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I'm sorry. REALLY MEANS You'll be sorry.
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Do you like this recipe? REALLY MEANS It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it
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Was that the baby? REALLY MEANS Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep.
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I'm not yelling! REALLY MEANS Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.
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All we're going to buy is a soap dish REALLY MEANS It goes without saying that we're stopping at the cosmetics department, the shoe department, and those lavender sheets would look great in the bedroom Did you bring your checkbook?

 

[ajoytoy]

The Rules

The female always makes the rules.


The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.


No male can possibly know all the rules.


If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all the rules.


The female is never wrong.


If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong.


If Rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.


The female can change her mind at any given point in time for any reason.


The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female.


The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.


The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.


The female must not, under any circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.


Any attempt by the male to document these rules could result in severe bodily harm.


If the female has PMS, all rules are null and void

 

[freelancc]