>Subject: Newcomer to Hell
>
>
>One day a guy died and found himself in hell. As he was wallowing in
>despair, he had his first meeting with a demon.
>The demon asked, "Why so glum?"
>
>The guy responded, "What do you think? I'm in hell!"
>
>"Hell's not so bad," the demon said. "We actually have a lot of fun down
>here. You a drinking man?"
>
>"Sure," the man said, "I love to drink."
>
>"Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays all we do is drink.
>Whisky, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet Tab and Fresca. We drink till
>we throw up and then we drink some more!"
>
>The guy is astounded. "Damn, that sounds great."
>
>"You a smoker?" the demon asked.
>
>"You better believe it!"
>
>"You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the
>world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer, no biggie. You're already
>dead, remember?"
>
>"Wow, the guy said, "that's awesome!"
>
>The demon continued. "I bet you like to gamble."
>
>"Why yes, as a matter of fact I do."
>
>"Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, blackjack, roulette,
>poker,slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, well, you're dead anyhow. You
>into drugs?"
>
>The guy said, "Are you kidding? I love drugs! You don't mean . . ."
>
>"That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of
>crack, or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the
>drugs you want, you're dead, who cares!"
>
>"Wow," the guy said, starting to feel better about his situation, "I never
>realized Hell was such a cool place!"
>
>The demon said, "You gay?"
>
>"No."
>
>"Ooooh, you're gonna hate Fridays"
>
>
>
>
>One day a guy died and found himself in hell. As he was wallowing in
>despair, he had his first meeting with a demon.
>The demon asked, "Why so glum?"
>
>The guy responded, "What do you think? I'm in hell!"
>
>"Hell's not so bad," the demon said. "We actually have a lot of fun down
>here. You a drinking man?"
>
>"Sure," the man said, "I love to drink."
>
>"Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays all we do is drink.
>Whisky, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet Tab and Fresca. We drink till
>we throw up and then we drink some more!"
>
>The guy is astounded. "Damn, that sounds great."
>
>"You a smoker?" the demon asked.
>
>"You better believe it!"
>
>"You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the
>world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer, no biggie. You're already
>dead, remember?"
>
>"Wow, the guy said, "that's awesome!"
>
>The demon continued. "I bet you like to gamble."
>
>"Why yes, as a matter of fact I do."
>
>"Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, blackjack, roulette,
>poker,slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, well, you're dead anyhow. You
>into drugs?"
>
>The guy said, "Are you kidding? I love drugs! You don't mean . . ."
>
>"That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of
>crack, or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the
>drugs you want, you're dead, who cares!"
>
>"Wow," the guy said, starting to feel better about his situation, "I never
>realized Hell was such a cool place!"
>
>The demon said, "You gay?"
>
>"No."
>
>"Ooooh, you're gonna hate Fridays"
>
>
