"Fat penguin" "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."
"If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon."
"My magical watch says you aren't wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!"
"You must work at Subway, 'cause you just gave me a footlong."
"Do you want to go to breakfast?" "Should I call you, or nudge you?"
Go up to a girl and say "Hi! My name is Haywood Jablomee"
"Mind if I stand here until it's safe where I farted"
"You must wash your clothes with windex... because I can see myself in your pants!"
"Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? No? Want to go upstairs and talk?"
"Excuse me, is your name Gillette? cause you're the best a man can get"
"I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you"
"Wanna go halves on a bastard???"
"Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?"
First buy an ice cream and find a hot girl, then say "I'm sorry to bother you, but your melting my ice cream!"
"The word of the day is legs. Let's go back to my crib and spread the word."
"I'm not actually this tall, I've got this bad habit of sitting on my wallet."
"Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!"
"Excuse me. Do you want to f**k or should I apologize?"
"I'm going to have sex with you tonight, so... you might as well be there."
"What's your name? Where you from? Do you plan on giving me some?"
"Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway."
"Nice shoes, wanna f**k?"
"What do you say we go back to my crib and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply."
"Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Heads at my place, tails at yours."
You say "Do you want to do a 68?" she says "What's that?" you say "You go down, and I'll owe you one."
"Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, "f**k it". "
"Love is a sensation, caused by a temptation, to feel penetration. a guy sticks his location in a girl's destination, to increase the population for the next generation, did you get my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?"
"Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under."
"Sex is like Pringles: once you pop, you can't stop. "
"Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it. "
"The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name. "
"Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel room."
"I bet you $20 you're gonna turn me down."
"What smiles, winks, is hung like a horse, and can last all night long?" (smile and wink)
"I'll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast."
"Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?"
"I have a six inch tongue and I can breath through my ears. "
"Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?"
"I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good."
"If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?"
"What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?"
"You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You're making the other women look really bad."
you say "You look just like my first wife" she says "How many times have you been married?" you say "never".
"If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever. "
"you say "I'm sorry, but you owe me a drink" she says "Why?" you say "Because I dropped mine when I looked at you"
"If I were a fly, I'd be all over you, because you're the shit! "
"Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend? "
"When God made you, he was showing off."
"If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
"If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon."
"My magical watch says you aren't wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!"
"You must work at Subway, 'cause you just gave me a footlong."
"Do you want to go to breakfast?" "Should I call you, or nudge you?"
Go up to a girl and say "Hi! My name is Haywood Jablomee"
"Mind if I stand here until it's safe where I farted"
"You must wash your clothes with windex... because I can see myself in your pants!"
"Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? No? Want to go upstairs and talk?"
"Excuse me, is your name Gillette? cause you're the best a man can get"
"I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you"
"Wanna go halves on a bastard???"
"Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?"
First buy an ice cream and find a hot girl, then say "I'm sorry to bother you, but your melting my ice cream!"
"The word of the day is legs. Let's go back to my crib and spread the word."
"I'm not actually this tall, I've got this bad habit of sitting on my wallet."
"Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!"
"Excuse me. Do you want to f**k or should I apologize?"
"I'm going to have sex with you tonight, so... you might as well be there."
"What's your name? Where you from? Do you plan on giving me some?"
"Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway."
"Nice shoes, wanna f**k?"
"What do you say we go back to my crib and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply."
"Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Heads at my place, tails at yours."
You say "Do you want to do a 68?" she says "What's that?" you say "You go down, and I'll owe you one."
"Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, "f**k it". "
"Love is a sensation, caused by a temptation, to feel penetration. a guy sticks his location in a girl's destination, to increase the population for the next generation, did you get my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?"
"Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under."
"Sex is like Pringles: once you pop, you can't stop. "
"Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it. "
"The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name. "
"Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel room."
"I bet you $20 you're gonna turn me down."
"What smiles, winks, is hung like a horse, and can last all night long?" (smile and wink)
"I'll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast."
"Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?"
"I have a six inch tongue and I can breath through my ears. "
"Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?"
"I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good."
"If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?"
"What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?"
"You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You're making the other women look really bad."
you say "You look just like my first wife" she says "How many times have you been married?" you say "never".
"If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever. "
"you say "I'm sorry, but you owe me a drink" she says "Why?" you say "Because I dropped mine when I looked at you"
"If I were a fly, I'd be all over you, because you're the shit! "
"Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend? "
"When God made you, he was showing off."
"If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
