Subject: WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN
To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are
our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something
to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence
did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And
the first thing he said was "DON'T!"
"Don't what?" Adam replied.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"
"No Way!"
"Yes way!"
"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering
why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few
minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!
"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.
"Uh huh," Adam replied.
"Then why did you?" said the Father.
"I don't know," said Eve.
"She started it!" Adam said
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"DID NOT!"
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that
Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern
was set and it has never changed.
BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom
and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had
trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to
walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat
word for word what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
6. We child proofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home.
AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND! "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are
our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something
to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence
did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And
the first thing he said was "DON'T!"
"Don't what?" Adam replied.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"
"No Way!"
"Yes way!"
"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering
why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few
minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!
"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.
"Uh huh," Adam replied.
"Then why did you?" said the Father.
"I don't know," said Eve.
"She started it!" Adam said
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"DID NOT!"
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that
Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern
was set and it has never changed.
BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom
and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had
trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to
walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat
word for word what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
6. We child proofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home.
AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND! "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
I have 3 teenagers and a 11 year old !!!!!!!!!! It seems like as of late , I been feeling a bit burned out!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just got done searching for the reason why my sons room smelled so bad LOL then I discovered a football equipment bag UGHHHH!!!!!! practice jersey, 4 wet from sweat, smelly t-shirts that had been in there since last week and a pants that used to be white and now are shit brown from the mud was discovered.............I SWEAR IT SMELLED LIKE A HOMELESS MAN WAS LIVING IN THERE ROOM when I opened the door this morning!!!!!!!!!!! 
