This is GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!! :142smilie :142smilie :142smilie :142smilie
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Q: Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
A: When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."
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Q: How do you fix a woman's watch?
A: You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Q:Why do men fart more than women?
A: Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
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Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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Q: What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A: A woman who won't do what she's told.
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Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%?
A: It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.
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Q:When will women gain equality to men?
A: Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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Quote from Mr. Wonderful:
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Biblical reference...
In the beginning,
God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Just a thought...
Any man that says he's boss in his own home will lie about other things!
kneifl
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
A: When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you fix a woman's watch?
A: You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q:Why do men fart more than women?
A: Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A: A woman who won't do what she's told.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%?
A: It's called a Wedding Cake.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q:When will women gain equality to men?
A: Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote from Mr. Wonderful:
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Biblical reference...
In the beginning,
God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Just a thought...
Any man that says he's boss in his own home will lie about other things!
kneifl
)
