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  1. Cricket

    Hell explained

    HELL EXPLAINED BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet...
  2. Cricket

    Go Deep!!

    http://www.flixxy.com/hubble-ultra-deep-field-3d.htm
  3. Cricket

    Computerproblem(joke)

    SENIORS & COMPUTERS As we Silver Surfers know, sometimes we have trouble with our computers. Yesterday, I had a problem, so I calledGeorgie, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to come over...
  4. Cricket

    Onoins and Christmas trees

    *Onions & Christmas Trees* A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there? The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs: In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm. In her 30's to...
  5. Cricket

    Dead Penquins

    > Dead Penguins - I never knew this! > > > Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica? > Where do they go? > > Wonder no more ! ! ! > It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives > an extremely ordered and complex life. The...
  7. Cricket

    Choosing a wife

    Choosing a wife A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup...
  8. Cricket

    CROW KILLS ANALYSIS

    Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely...
  9. Cricket

    JOKE

    The Greatness Of Socrates Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumor or spread gossip. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard...
  10. Cricket

    Hilton picks

    Anybody see the madjack teams picks?
  11. Cricket

    Sarcasm at its best(joke)

    Subject: SARCASM AT ITS BEST A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?" The mother says, "It's my daughter, Debbie. She keeps getting these Cravings. She's putting on weight, and is sick most mornings. The doctor...
  13. Cricket

    A Christmas Story

    HO HO HO!!!! When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the...
  14. Cricket

    Not so famous sports quotes

    "Last year we couldn't win at home and we were losing on the road. My failure as a coach was that I couldn't think of anyplace else to play." - Harry Neale, professional hockey coach "Blind people come to the ballpark just to listen to him pitch." - Reggie Jackson commenting on Tom...
  15. Cricket

    Praying To The Wall

    A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site. She watched him pray and...
  16. Cricket

    Late Night Vet Call

    A dog lover, whose dog was a female and "in heat', agreed to look after her neighbor's male dog while the neighbors were on vacation. She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds...
  17. Cricket

    Things You Can Get Away With Saying On Thanksgiving.

    HAPPY THANKSGIVING.LOVE AND PEACE TO ALL.... 1. Talk about a huge breast! > >2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist. > >3. It's Cool Whip time! > >4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst! > >5. Whew, that's one terrific spread! > >6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat. > >7...
  19. Cricket

    Early Christmas Joke

    Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. 'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.' The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it...
  20. Cricket

    The toilet seat

    > > > > > My wife, Julie, had been after me for several weeks to varnish the wooden seat on our toilet. > > Finally, I got around to doing it while Julie was out. After finishing, I left to take care of another matter before she returned. > > She came in and...
  21. Cricket

    Medical Check Up

    An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up... The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said ,'Things are great and I've never felt better.' I now have a 20 yr-old bride who is pregnant with my child. 'So what do you think about that Doc ?' The...
  22. Cricket

    Too much golf !!!

    This is what too much golf can do to you! Eileen and her husband John went for counselling after 25 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, Eileen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married. She...
  23. Cricket

    Fowl Bowel

    Bryan came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep. He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he woke up he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe...
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