i got this from another site & thought posters here would find it interesting.does anyone have any others?
The Dumb-ass Dozen
Somebody get Mensa on the line, stat! We?re counting down the 12 stupidest sports plays of all time?and those nerds probably need a good laugh.
Maxim, December 2002
By Allen St. John
Aside from The Anna Nicole Show, is there anything funnier than watching some millionaire jockstrap crash and burn? We?ve all seen it: A hotshot sporto spends a lifetime getting to the big show?Super Bowl, heavyweight title fight, Olympic finals, whatever?and in the crucial moment, when everything?s on the line, he screws the freakin? pooch. We?re not talking minor, everyday foul-ups; we?re talking championships, multimillion-dollar endorsements, and entire careers flushed down the crapper in an instant?and replayed forever! So without further ado, here is the Bonehead Hall of Shame.
12. Baby Steps
BABE RUTH; 1926 WORLD SERIES, GAME 7
The first nominee for Stupidest Sports Moment of All Time?the Babe. Down by a run with two outs in the ninth inning of Game 7 of the World Series, you?d think you?d want Ruth on your side. Think again. With the 1926 championship on the line, the Sultan of Swat drew a walk against the Cardinals? Grover Cleveland Alexander. So far, so good, right? But then, with the legendary Bob Meusel at the plate and Lou ?the Greatest Hitter Ever? Gehrig on deck, lardass Ruth inexplicably attempted to steal second and was thrown out by a country mile, losing both the game and the series. Way to go, fat boy.
11. Snake ?N? Bake
KEN STABLER; 1965, ALABAMA VS. TENNESSEE
Need one reason why Kenny ?the Snake-Bitten? Stabler isn?t in the College Football Hall of Fame? Here goes. With time running down and his Alabama Crimson Tide on the Tennessee Volunteers four-yard line driving for the winning score, QB Stabler blew a fuse. With an entire state?s pride on the line, genius forgot it was fourth down and tried to stop the clock by tossing the ball out of bounds. Game over, dumb-ass?game over.
10. Ball-Buster
JACK SHARKEY; 1927 HEAVYWEIGHT FIGHT VS. JACK DEMPSEY
In a nutshell: Sharkey got bitch-slapped. This bum was actually beating the crap out of legendary fighter Jack Dempsey when Dempsey landed a punch to Sharkey?s nuts. Instead of fighting back, Sharkey dropped his gloves to complain to the ref, and Dempsey unleashed a left hook that, one reporter wrote, ?knocked [Sharkey] into the previous morning.? Dempsey was unrepentant: ?What was I supposed to do? Mail him a letter??
9. Fumblin? and Bumblin?
JIM MARSHALL; 1964, MINNESOTA VIKINGS VS. SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS
?Think of the worst thing you?ve ever done?the thing you?re most ashamed of?and it was seen by 80 million people,? former Minnesota Viking Jim Marshall recalled. ?Then think of people coming up to you and reminding you of it for the rest of your life. That?s what I?ve gone through.? Though one of the NFL?s greatest linemen, Marshall made God?s blooper reel by recovering a fumble against the San Francisco 49ers and triumphantly running the pigskin 66 yards?into the wrong end zone! Instead of a touchdown, the Vikings were assessed a safety, and the football world has never stopped giggling.
8. Three-e-e-e-e!
ROBERTO DE VICENZO; 1968 MASTERS
Let?s see?three plus four plus three is? um?11? Playing the round of his life on his 45th birthday, Argentine golfer Roberto De Vicenzo shot a seven-under-par 65 at Augusta to force a one-hole playoff for the title. Great, right? Wrong. This putter-putz signed an incorrect scorecard that instead credited him with a six-under 66. (De Vicenzo?s partner gave him a par on the 17th hole, where he actually shot a birdie.) By PGA rules, he had to stand?and die?by the score. ?I lose my brain,? De Vicenzo said. ?I play golf all over the world for 30 years, and now all I can think of is what a stupid I am.? Gee, don?t get teed off.
7. Pacing Yourself
SCOTT GOODYEAR; 1995 INDIANAPOLIS 500
Every gearhead from Jeff Gordon to Paul Newman knows two things. One: The Indy 500 is the only race that matters. And B: Never?ever!?pass the freakin? pace car. In 1995, Canadian driver Scott Goodyear, who?d never won a major race, was actually leading the famed Indy 500 with only 10 laps to go when he idiotically zoomed past the Corvette pace car. He ignored a black flag at lap 191 and was given a five-lap penalty. On the bright side, Goodyear would never again be in the position to blow a big-time race.
6. Yer Wa-a-a-y Outta There!
CHUCK KNOBLAUCH; 1998 AMERICAN LEAGUE DIVISION SERIES
Many of us think that Yankee second baseman ?Chuck Brainlauch,? as one New York tabloid headline dubbed him, should be higher on the list based solely on this dumb-ass quote: ?If I had it to do all over again, I?d do it the same way.? What the @#$%? This jackass was covering first on a bunt in the 12th inning of a tied playoff game when first baseman Tino Martinez? throw hit the runner in the back. As the runner was called safe, Chucky just stood over the ball bitching to the umpire while the winning run cruised from first base and across home plate. As punishment, the baseball gods have stricken Knoblauch with a disorder that prevents him from throwing the ball anywhere near first base.
5. From Flash to Flush
MIRUTS YIFTER; 1972 OLYMPICS
Just because you?re fast doesn?t mean you?re swift. Ethiopian distance runner Miruts Yifter, winner of 221 of 252 career races, was a guaranteed lock to win the 5,000 meters gold medal at the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich. But he inexplicably missed the starting gun because he was lightening his load in a trackside bathroom. (Maybe he had the runs. Get it?) Four years later, Ethiopia joined a boycott of the 1976 Olympics in Montreal, so it wasn?t until 1980 that Yifter was able to win the gold medal he?d crapped away eight years earlier.
4. No Horsing Around
WILLIE SHOEMAKER; 1957 KENTUCKY DERBY
Could it be?God forbid!?that horse racing is fixed? Or was legendary jockey Willie Shoemaker just dumber than his freakin? horse? You decide: Tearing down the home stretch of the world?s most important horse race, Shoemaker, comfortably in the lead aboard Gallant Man, stood up in his saddle?and let the 8:1 Iron Liege pass him for the win. ?I hadn?t been to Churchill Downs in a while, so I forgot the finish line was farther down the stretch,? said Shoemaker, who?d actually won there only two years earlier. Yeah, and Bill Clinton just forgot to inhale.
3. Beantown Bonehead
JOHN MCNAMARA; 1986 WORLD SERIES, GAME SIX
Woodrow Wilson was president the last time the Red Sox had won the World Series?but this was it! The Sox were up three games to two with a 5?3 lead in the 10th inning. The Mets were down to their last out; Keith Hernandez was already in the clubhouse boozin?. And that?s when Boston manager John McNamara said to himself, ?What curse?? and left pitcher Calvin Schiraldi on the mound to get beaten like a rented mule. Then, after the Mets had tied the game on a wild pitch by Bob Stanley, McNamara inexplicably left Bill Buckner, who was so hobbled by injury he couldn?t win a footrace with Bob Hope, in at first base?and you know what happened there. McNamara?s excuse? He wanted Buckner to be on the field when they won. Guess that?s why he makes the big bucks.
2. Ru-u-u-u-n!
ANDRES ESCOBAR; 1994 WORLD CUP
When Colombian soccer star Andres Escobar blew his blow-obsessed nation?s crucial 1994 World Cup match against the hated United States by deflecting a teammate?s crossing pass into his own goal, he had no idea how badly he?d just ****ed up. Sure, the errant pass rolled into his own net for a goal, eliminating Colombia from the tournament in disgrace on the sport?s biggest stage. But no man should have to live with that sort of guilt forever, right? So upon his return, Escobar?s countrymen ambushed him outside a nightclub and put him out of his misery, pumping 12 shots into him while shouting, ?Own goal.? That?ll teach him.
1. March Madness. Madness!
CHRIS WEBBER; 1993 NCAA CHAMPIONSHIP GAME
And the winner is?Christopher ?T.O.? Webber. Congratulations, dumb-ass. Trailing by two points with 11 seconds on the clock and the NCAA Championship on the line, the 22-year-old Michigan hoops phenom called a time-out that his team didn?t have, giving North Carolina two technical foul shots and the title. To this day, it?s the most moronic way any team has ever lost a major championship. Or is it? Webber, now in the NBA and still without a championship of any kind, was recently indicted for lying to a grand jury about taking $280,000 in cash and gifts from a reputed gambler during his two-year college career. So, to recap the allegations: Webber blew the game, took the cash, perjured himself, and now he?s banging Tyra Banks. Hey, maybe we hate this guy even more than we thought.
The Dumb-ass Dozen
Somebody get Mensa on the line, stat! We?re counting down the 12 stupidest sports plays of all time?and those nerds probably need a good laugh.
Maxim, December 2002
By Allen St. John
Aside from The Anna Nicole Show, is there anything funnier than watching some millionaire jockstrap crash and burn? We?ve all seen it: A hotshot sporto spends a lifetime getting to the big show?Super Bowl, heavyweight title fight, Olympic finals, whatever?and in the crucial moment, when everything?s on the line, he screws the freakin? pooch. We?re not talking minor, everyday foul-ups; we?re talking championships, multimillion-dollar endorsements, and entire careers flushed down the crapper in an instant?and replayed forever! So without further ado, here is the Bonehead Hall of Shame.
12. Baby Steps
BABE RUTH; 1926 WORLD SERIES, GAME 7
The first nominee for Stupidest Sports Moment of All Time?the Babe. Down by a run with two outs in the ninth inning of Game 7 of the World Series, you?d think you?d want Ruth on your side. Think again. With the 1926 championship on the line, the Sultan of Swat drew a walk against the Cardinals? Grover Cleveland Alexander. So far, so good, right? But then, with the legendary Bob Meusel at the plate and Lou ?the Greatest Hitter Ever? Gehrig on deck, lardass Ruth inexplicably attempted to steal second and was thrown out by a country mile, losing both the game and the series. Way to go, fat boy.
11. Snake ?N? Bake
KEN STABLER; 1965, ALABAMA VS. TENNESSEE
Need one reason why Kenny ?the Snake-Bitten? Stabler isn?t in the College Football Hall of Fame? Here goes. With time running down and his Alabama Crimson Tide on the Tennessee Volunteers four-yard line driving for the winning score, QB Stabler blew a fuse. With an entire state?s pride on the line, genius forgot it was fourth down and tried to stop the clock by tossing the ball out of bounds. Game over, dumb-ass?game over.
10. Ball-Buster
JACK SHARKEY; 1927 HEAVYWEIGHT FIGHT VS. JACK DEMPSEY
In a nutshell: Sharkey got bitch-slapped. This bum was actually beating the crap out of legendary fighter Jack Dempsey when Dempsey landed a punch to Sharkey?s nuts. Instead of fighting back, Sharkey dropped his gloves to complain to the ref, and Dempsey unleashed a left hook that, one reporter wrote, ?knocked [Sharkey] into the previous morning.? Dempsey was unrepentant: ?What was I supposed to do? Mail him a letter??
9. Fumblin? and Bumblin?
JIM MARSHALL; 1964, MINNESOTA VIKINGS VS. SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS
?Think of the worst thing you?ve ever done?the thing you?re most ashamed of?and it was seen by 80 million people,? former Minnesota Viking Jim Marshall recalled. ?Then think of people coming up to you and reminding you of it for the rest of your life. That?s what I?ve gone through.? Though one of the NFL?s greatest linemen, Marshall made God?s blooper reel by recovering a fumble against the San Francisco 49ers and triumphantly running the pigskin 66 yards?into the wrong end zone! Instead of a touchdown, the Vikings were assessed a safety, and the football world has never stopped giggling.
8. Three-e-e-e-e!
ROBERTO DE VICENZO; 1968 MASTERS
Let?s see?three plus four plus three is? um?11? Playing the round of his life on his 45th birthday, Argentine golfer Roberto De Vicenzo shot a seven-under-par 65 at Augusta to force a one-hole playoff for the title. Great, right? Wrong. This putter-putz signed an incorrect scorecard that instead credited him with a six-under 66. (De Vicenzo?s partner gave him a par on the 17th hole, where he actually shot a birdie.) By PGA rules, he had to stand?and die?by the score. ?I lose my brain,? De Vicenzo said. ?I play golf all over the world for 30 years, and now all I can think of is what a stupid I am.? Gee, don?t get teed off.
7. Pacing Yourself
SCOTT GOODYEAR; 1995 INDIANAPOLIS 500
Every gearhead from Jeff Gordon to Paul Newman knows two things. One: The Indy 500 is the only race that matters. And B: Never?ever!?pass the freakin? pace car. In 1995, Canadian driver Scott Goodyear, who?d never won a major race, was actually leading the famed Indy 500 with only 10 laps to go when he idiotically zoomed past the Corvette pace car. He ignored a black flag at lap 191 and was given a five-lap penalty. On the bright side, Goodyear would never again be in the position to blow a big-time race.
6. Yer Wa-a-a-y Outta There!
CHUCK KNOBLAUCH; 1998 AMERICAN LEAGUE DIVISION SERIES
Many of us think that Yankee second baseman ?Chuck Brainlauch,? as one New York tabloid headline dubbed him, should be higher on the list based solely on this dumb-ass quote: ?If I had it to do all over again, I?d do it the same way.? What the @#$%? This jackass was covering first on a bunt in the 12th inning of a tied playoff game when first baseman Tino Martinez? throw hit the runner in the back. As the runner was called safe, Chucky just stood over the ball bitching to the umpire while the winning run cruised from first base and across home plate. As punishment, the baseball gods have stricken Knoblauch with a disorder that prevents him from throwing the ball anywhere near first base.
5. From Flash to Flush
MIRUTS YIFTER; 1972 OLYMPICS
Just because you?re fast doesn?t mean you?re swift. Ethiopian distance runner Miruts Yifter, winner of 221 of 252 career races, was a guaranteed lock to win the 5,000 meters gold medal at the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich. But he inexplicably missed the starting gun because he was lightening his load in a trackside bathroom. (Maybe he had the runs. Get it?) Four years later, Ethiopia joined a boycott of the 1976 Olympics in Montreal, so it wasn?t until 1980 that Yifter was able to win the gold medal he?d crapped away eight years earlier.
4. No Horsing Around
WILLIE SHOEMAKER; 1957 KENTUCKY DERBY
Could it be?God forbid!?that horse racing is fixed? Or was legendary jockey Willie Shoemaker just dumber than his freakin? horse? You decide: Tearing down the home stretch of the world?s most important horse race, Shoemaker, comfortably in the lead aboard Gallant Man, stood up in his saddle?and let the 8:1 Iron Liege pass him for the win. ?I hadn?t been to Churchill Downs in a while, so I forgot the finish line was farther down the stretch,? said Shoemaker, who?d actually won there only two years earlier. Yeah, and Bill Clinton just forgot to inhale.
3. Beantown Bonehead
JOHN MCNAMARA; 1986 WORLD SERIES, GAME SIX
Woodrow Wilson was president the last time the Red Sox had won the World Series?but this was it! The Sox were up three games to two with a 5?3 lead in the 10th inning. The Mets were down to their last out; Keith Hernandez was already in the clubhouse boozin?. And that?s when Boston manager John McNamara said to himself, ?What curse?? and left pitcher Calvin Schiraldi on the mound to get beaten like a rented mule. Then, after the Mets had tied the game on a wild pitch by Bob Stanley, McNamara inexplicably left Bill Buckner, who was so hobbled by injury he couldn?t win a footrace with Bob Hope, in at first base?and you know what happened there. McNamara?s excuse? He wanted Buckner to be on the field when they won. Guess that?s why he makes the big bucks.
2. Ru-u-u-u-n!
ANDRES ESCOBAR; 1994 WORLD CUP
When Colombian soccer star Andres Escobar blew his blow-obsessed nation?s crucial 1994 World Cup match against the hated United States by deflecting a teammate?s crossing pass into his own goal, he had no idea how badly he?d just ****ed up. Sure, the errant pass rolled into his own net for a goal, eliminating Colombia from the tournament in disgrace on the sport?s biggest stage. But no man should have to live with that sort of guilt forever, right? So upon his return, Escobar?s countrymen ambushed him outside a nightclub and put him out of his misery, pumping 12 shots into him while shouting, ?Own goal.? That?ll teach him.
1. March Madness. Madness!
CHRIS WEBBER; 1993 NCAA CHAMPIONSHIP GAME
And the winner is?Christopher ?T.O.? Webber. Congratulations, dumb-ass. Trailing by two points with 11 seconds on the clock and the NCAA Championship on the line, the 22-year-old Michigan hoops phenom called a time-out that his team didn?t have, giving North Carolina two technical foul shots and the title. To this day, it?s the most moronic way any team has ever lost a major championship. Or is it? Webber, now in the NBA and still without a championship of any kind, was recently indicted for lying to a grand jury about taking $280,000 in cash and gifts from a reputed gambler during his two-year college career. So, to recap the allegations: Webber blew the game, took the cash, perjured himself, and now he?s banging Tyra Banks. Hey, maybe we hate this guy even more than we thought.
