Craps? Tales (of woe) From The ?Dark Side?
Craps??..I?ve always been a fan of the game, but it has never been a fan of mine. Those of you whom have felt the incessant slap of Dame Fortune will attest to my lament. I have never been a part of the elusive ?hot roll? that I have heard so much about. I have never been in a casino where one has taken place, and I have spent several hundred accumulated hours in these dens of sin.
Tuesday, I took advantage of a day off from work to drive up to the local Indian joint in Green Bay. It is always a pleasant hour long jaunt that offers promise of wealth. (Or at least gas money, and a number 6 meal at Mickey D?s on the way home.) I have been having a little run of ?gambling nirvana? of late, and I was in the zone where I felt I would not lose today, either. You know that feeling??. You have had it playing cards, dice, betting the ponies, or playing poker. You remember the streaks where every game you bet comes home, or at least more winners than losers on the day occur for a week or two straight? Well, that was where I was. I made money in Las Vegas a couple weeks ago. I went to the Indian reservation a week back and won about five hundy at the tables there. ($200 of which came on a full house while playing Let It Ride for three hands, while my girlfriend went to the john.) A couple days later, I ran up there and made a quick $300 playing blackjack again. I decided to cash out, and on my way out the door, I figured I had about $40 that wasn?t doing anything, so I ?invested? it on a Caribbean Stud game. Mind you, I have never played the game, but I thought I would give it a shot.
I sidled up to the table, and proudly plopped my ass in a chair between two other people. I announced to the dealer the words that every seasoned gambler hates to hear at his table. ?I?ve never played this game before.? Luckily, neither of the other guys at the table seemed to be upset by this fact. I placed the $5 minimum on the table, and placed an additional buck in the bonus box. I played about 4-5 hands, and lost most, but did get a pair that beat the dealer on one of those hands. On my next hand, I placed a buck out for the dealer, too. She dealt the cards, (which is to say she grabbed them from the automatic card dispenser) and I picked them up one by one, as is my custom when I play cards. I immediately saw two 9?s. That is so-so, but I was happy. The next card was another 9! (Shit??No, it was a six. The quick glance had me hoping it was a 9, but it was not.) The fourth card was a nine, though, and lo and behold, so was the fifth card! Four of a kind! I looked at the bonus schedule, and saw my buck paid me $500! I was pretty happy about that, but I still needed the dealer to have at least an Ace/King to ?qualify? so I could win another $300 on the initial wager I had out there. Sure enough. She flips over a pair of something, and I win! She was happy, because she won $63 on the bet I had out for her. So, I skipped out of there with about $1,200 to the good. (The winning kept coming in the strangest ways, but I was not about to complain!)
Anyway, back to the day of ?craps?. I started the same way as I always do. Playing 21. I lost $300 in about 10 minutes at a $10 table! This was not what I was looking for, obviously. I decided to try my luck at my new ?favorite?, CStud. Well, that was no better, and I slid deeper into a hole. I changed up, and went to the LIR table, and made back a few bucks. The bad news was, I was still in $175.
I made an administrative move, and walked to the craps table. Now, I had said earlier that craps hates me. It wipes me out as fast as it can. I am gambling?s Sisyphus, and the dice are my boulder. Well, semi-true to form, the table was choppy. I made some, lost it back, etc. My bankroll of $325 was down to about eighty bucks, when the dice got passed to some old timer. I ended up calling this geezer ?junior?, because he was anything but. He appeared to be in his late 60?s to early 100?s, depending on which way the light hit him. He was certainly a sight.
He wore the obligatory Sansa-Belt slacks, with mismatching shirt. He had on a beautiful windbreaker of some shade of brown, and his ?bus tag? was hanging from the lapel. (You know??the ?tour bus? tag, that tells the casino that you are with ABC Tours) Well, I eyed up this dandy, and said, ?Here we go??? The gal next to me, and the guy next to her, had similar groans of disdain. Now, I don?t consider myself to be ?superstitious?, but at the craps table, you WILL have your superstitions! This guy fit the mold of ?loser? to a T!
Well, he gets the ?bones?, and makes a majestic toss that gats about halfway to the other end of the table. ?Thee, CRAPS!? is the call from the stick. An instantaneous groan rises from the players. (Except the one dink who has been playing the ?don?t? side.) Well, I say to the ?more than a little dyke-ish troll? next to me, ?I?m off of his guy!? She keeps tossing a fiver at the center of the board and yelling, ?Gimmie a Yo!?
I watch the next five rolls from this old goat, and he sets a number, and makes it. Sets it, makes it. Tosses a seven. Three passes. Hmmmm???.. I gotta get back on the horse!( Mr ?don?t is looking a little pissed, by the way.) I make $10 line bets, double odds, and place the 6-8 for $12 each. This guy throws everything on the board but 7. The only time he did throw a 7, was on a come out. This saves the ?don?t? bettor a few times by allowing him to collect on the don?t come numbers he had up. I kept shouting, ?Keep it up, junior!? and, ?That youngster can shoot some dice, folks!? The crowd was having some fun with it, but the old guy NEVER ONCE got the bones to the back wall! I figured for sure that the pit would say something, but all they said was that he had to get the dice past the center of the layout. I was on the stickman?s right, and we were having a good time razzing the old timer. Stick says to me: ?When those dice get down here, blow on ?em, and get ?em to the wall for him?.? At one point, I yelled down to the guy, ?You hit me another 6 or 8, and I?ll pay for your Tommy John surgery!?
He held the dice for about 15 minutes before he seven-ed out. The crowd gave a round of applause, and this dice came to my end of the table. The sad thing was, the guy left right after his roll. The table was rolling in in chips from him, and he made 5 bucks. The stickman told me that the poor guy only had a $5 wager on the pass line, and that entire long stretch once I got back in, was everything but his number!
Next, the dice go to the ?don?t pass? player. He picks up the dice and I say, ?Are you going to shoot from the ?don?t? side?? He just glared at me for a second, grabbed the dice, and tossed them. He hit craps. I saw a little wry smile from the edge of his smug face, and I said, once again, ?I ain?t betting with this lump tossing the dice.? What a dick! Take your stupid $5 bet and go home! Well, he tosses the dice again, and gets a six. I watch for about six more rolls, and he?s hitting some nice numbers, but not his six. I decide to get in???
Same routine for me as before. This guy tosses number after number. I am watching him lose $5 a roll, as he keeps repeating numbers that he has bet on the ?don?t come?. He started with about $70 in the rack, and it was down to about $25. Meanwhile, the rest of the table is planning for their kids? college tuition! The guy two down from me is making every bad bet on the board. Hard ways, Hi-Low, Horn, etc?..hitting over and over. I am content to just hit the 6-8, and my come bets. After about 20 rolls, I decide to get with the rest of the table, and make a hard way on the 6. $5 for me, and a buck for the boys. Roll, after roll, after roll, no six! Every time I hit the eight though, I tossed another $5 on the hard 6. I finally had that bastid up to $20, and had $8 for the dealers. By now, Darth Vader was out of chips! All he had was his don?t pass wager sitting in the little penalty box where it belonged! It?s going on 30 minutes for this rube. Roll after roll! Everyone at the table gets paid on every roll! This was the first legitimate ?hot shooter? I have ever seen. My problem, and the same with the rest of the low ballers at the table, no one was pressing their wagers up! We kept hanging onto our little initial wagers! In hind sight, I am pissed, but I get pretty pissed when I see a 7 wipe out all my profit for a shooter, too!
By now, everyone at the table, sans the shooter, has a couple of bucks on the hard 6. I toss $4 in loose chips at the stick and yell, ?Thirty-three hopping!?
?That?s a bet!?, he shouts back, and the dice go down the table????.
3-3 !!!!!!! The sound from that table was the loudest I have ever heard in a casino! We were all high-fiving, and hee-hawing, like school kids! I picked up $180 on the hard way, and another $120 for the ?hop?. We all clapped for the shooter, even though he was busted out.
One of the dealers said, ?You guys should toss him a few bucks?..he made you a lot of cash.? I said, ?You guys just made over a hundy on that hard 6 bet I made for you, and others capped . Why don?t you give him that?
The dealer looked at the shooter and said, ?Better luck next time, sir.? I said, ?That?s what I thought???
If the guy was shooting from the pass with a small bank, people would have tossed him a bone. You wanna play from the ?Dark Side?, you are on your own.
I decided enough was enough, and cashed out up $350 on the day. The streak will have to end, but not today. Today, I get to ride with a smile and enjoy the ?high? that only a gambler can know. It is, indeed, a very sweet feeling????..
My number 6 value meal was great, as well!
Craps??..I?ve always been a fan of the game, but it has never been a fan of mine. Those of you whom have felt the incessant slap of Dame Fortune will attest to my lament. I have never been a part of the elusive ?hot roll? that I have heard so much about. I have never been in a casino where one has taken place, and I have spent several hundred accumulated hours in these dens of sin.
Tuesday, I took advantage of a day off from work to drive up to the local Indian joint in Green Bay. It is always a pleasant hour long jaunt that offers promise of wealth. (Or at least gas money, and a number 6 meal at Mickey D?s on the way home.) I have been having a little run of ?gambling nirvana? of late, and I was in the zone where I felt I would not lose today, either. You know that feeling??. You have had it playing cards, dice, betting the ponies, or playing poker. You remember the streaks where every game you bet comes home, or at least more winners than losers on the day occur for a week or two straight? Well, that was where I was. I made money in Las Vegas a couple weeks ago. I went to the Indian reservation a week back and won about five hundy at the tables there. ($200 of which came on a full house while playing Let It Ride for three hands, while my girlfriend went to the john.) A couple days later, I ran up there and made a quick $300 playing blackjack again. I decided to cash out, and on my way out the door, I figured I had about $40 that wasn?t doing anything, so I ?invested? it on a Caribbean Stud game. Mind you, I have never played the game, but I thought I would give it a shot.
I sidled up to the table, and proudly plopped my ass in a chair between two other people. I announced to the dealer the words that every seasoned gambler hates to hear at his table. ?I?ve never played this game before.? Luckily, neither of the other guys at the table seemed to be upset by this fact. I placed the $5 minimum on the table, and placed an additional buck in the bonus box. I played about 4-5 hands, and lost most, but did get a pair that beat the dealer on one of those hands. On my next hand, I placed a buck out for the dealer, too. She dealt the cards, (which is to say she grabbed them from the automatic card dispenser) and I picked them up one by one, as is my custom when I play cards. I immediately saw two 9?s. That is so-so, but I was happy. The next card was another 9! (Shit??No, it was a six. The quick glance had me hoping it was a 9, but it was not.) The fourth card was a nine, though, and lo and behold, so was the fifth card! Four of a kind! I looked at the bonus schedule, and saw my buck paid me $500! I was pretty happy about that, but I still needed the dealer to have at least an Ace/King to ?qualify? so I could win another $300 on the initial wager I had out there. Sure enough. She flips over a pair of something, and I win! She was happy, because she won $63 on the bet I had out for her. So, I skipped out of there with about $1,200 to the good. (The winning kept coming in the strangest ways, but I was not about to complain!)
Anyway, back to the day of ?craps?. I started the same way as I always do. Playing 21. I lost $300 in about 10 minutes at a $10 table! This was not what I was looking for, obviously. I decided to try my luck at my new ?favorite?, CStud. Well, that was no better, and I slid deeper into a hole. I changed up, and went to the LIR table, and made back a few bucks. The bad news was, I was still in $175.
I made an administrative move, and walked to the craps table. Now, I had said earlier that craps hates me. It wipes me out as fast as it can. I am gambling?s Sisyphus, and the dice are my boulder. Well, semi-true to form, the table was choppy. I made some, lost it back, etc. My bankroll of $325 was down to about eighty bucks, when the dice got passed to some old timer. I ended up calling this geezer ?junior?, because he was anything but. He appeared to be in his late 60?s to early 100?s, depending on which way the light hit him. He was certainly a sight.
He wore the obligatory Sansa-Belt slacks, with mismatching shirt. He had on a beautiful windbreaker of some shade of brown, and his ?bus tag? was hanging from the lapel. (You know??the ?tour bus? tag, that tells the casino that you are with ABC Tours) Well, I eyed up this dandy, and said, ?Here we go??? The gal next to me, and the guy next to her, had similar groans of disdain. Now, I don?t consider myself to be ?superstitious?, but at the craps table, you WILL have your superstitions! This guy fit the mold of ?loser? to a T!
Well, he gets the ?bones?, and makes a majestic toss that gats about halfway to the other end of the table. ?Thee, CRAPS!? is the call from the stick. An instantaneous groan rises from the players. (Except the one dink who has been playing the ?don?t? side.) Well, I say to the ?more than a little dyke-ish troll? next to me, ?I?m off of his guy!? She keeps tossing a fiver at the center of the board and yelling, ?Gimmie a Yo!?
I watch the next five rolls from this old goat, and he sets a number, and makes it. Sets it, makes it. Tosses a seven. Three passes. Hmmmm???.. I gotta get back on the horse!( Mr ?don?t is looking a little pissed, by the way.) I make $10 line bets, double odds, and place the 6-8 for $12 each. This guy throws everything on the board but 7. The only time he did throw a 7, was on a come out. This saves the ?don?t? bettor a few times by allowing him to collect on the don?t come numbers he had up. I kept shouting, ?Keep it up, junior!? and, ?That youngster can shoot some dice, folks!? The crowd was having some fun with it, but the old guy NEVER ONCE got the bones to the back wall! I figured for sure that the pit would say something, but all they said was that he had to get the dice past the center of the layout. I was on the stickman?s right, and we were having a good time razzing the old timer. Stick says to me: ?When those dice get down here, blow on ?em, and get ?em to the wall for him?.? At one point, I yelled down to the guy, ?You hit me another 6 or 8, and I?ll pay for your Tommy John surgery!?
He held the dice for about 15 minutes before he seven-ed out. The crowd gave a round of applause, and this dice came to my end of the table. The sad thing was, the guy left right after his roll. The table was rolling in in chips from him, and he made 5 bucks. The stickman told me that the poor guy only had a $5 wager on the pass line, and that entire long stretch once I got back in, was everything but his number!
Next, the dice go to the ?don?t pass? player. He picks up the dice and I say, ?Are you going to shoot from the ?don?t? side?? He just glared at me for a second, grabbed the dice, and tossed them. He hit craps. I saw a little wry smile from the edge of his smug face, and I said, once again, ?I ain?t betting with this lump tossing the dice.? What a dick! Take your stupid $5 bet and go home! Well, he tosses the dice again, and gets a six. I watch for about six more rolls, and he?s hitting some nice numbers, but not his six. I decide to get in???
Same routine for me as before. This guy tosses number after number. I am watching him lose $5 a roll, as he keeps repeating numbers that he has bet on the ?don?t come?. He started with about $70 in the rack, and it was down to about $25. Meanwhile, the rest of the table is planning for their kids? college tuition! The guy two down from me is making every bad bet on the board. Hard ways, Hi-Low, Horn, etc?..hitting over and over. I am content to just hit the 6-8, and my come bets. After about 20 rolls, I decide to get with the rest of the table, and make a hard way on the 6. $5 for me, and a buck for the boys. Roll, after roll, after roll, no six! Every time I hit the eight though, I tossed another $5 on the hard 6. I finally had that bastid up to $20, and had $8 for the dealers. By now, Darth Vader was out of chips! All he had was his don?t pass wager sitting in the little penalty box where it belonged! It?s going on 30 minutes for this rube. Roll after roll! Everyone at the table gets paid on every roll! This was the first legitimate ?hot shooter? I have ever seen. My problem, and the same with the rest of the low ballers at the table, no one was pressing their wagers up! We kept hanging onto our little initial wagers! In hind sight, I am pissed, but I get pretty pissed when I see a 7 wipe out all my profit for a shooter, too!
By now, everyone at the table, sans the shooter, has a couple of bucks on the hard 6. I toss $4 in loose chips at the stick and yell, ?Thirty-three hopping!?
?That?s a bet!?, he shouts back, and the dice go down the table????.
3-3 !!!!!!! The sound from that table was the loudest I have ever heard in a casino! We were all high-fiving, and hee-hawing, like school kids! I picked up $180 on the hard way, and another $120 for the ?hop?. We all clapped for the shooter, even though he was busted out.
One of the dealers said, ?You guys should toss him a few bucks?..he made you a lot of cash.? I said, ?You guys just made over a hundy on that hard 6 bet I made for you, and others capped . Why don?t you give him that?
The dealer looked at the shooter and said, ?Better luck next time, sir.? I said, ?That?s what I thought???
If the guy was shooting from the pass with a small bank, people would have tossed him a bone. You wanna play from the ?Dark Side?, you are on your own.
I decided enough was enough, and cashed out up $350 on the day. The streak will have to end, but not today. Today, I get to ride with a smile and enjoy the ?high? that only a gambler can know. It is, indeed, a very sweet feeling????..
My number 6 value meal was great, as well!