Colonoscopies

[IntenseOperator]

A physician claimed that the followings are actual comments made by MadJacks patients (predominately male) while he was performing their Colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"

10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

12. "God, Now I know why I am not gay."

And the best one of them all...

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there."

:moon:

 

[Clem D]

:mj07:


That was some funny shit

 

[trolln4walii]

Thanks for the laughs IO. Just had my first one last September and was looking for my response. Chuckled at all of them and then fell out of my chair with #13. That is hysterical :mj07:


(BTW.....my response to Doc was, "You can tell the Bears to come out now. I'm not taking it up the arse with those bastids this season.")

 

[mode the lode]

WHEN MY WIFE HAD HER HISTERECTOMEY
THE DOC TOLD ME NO DEEP PENETRATION FOR A WHILE
I TOLD HIM HE NEVER HAS TO WORRY ABOUT THAT

HE LAUGHED HIS BALLS OFF

 

[mode the lode]

OH BY THE WAY
COLONOSCOPIES ARE A PIECE OF CAKE HAD 3 SO FAR

GET ONE IF YOU ARE 50 AND OVER

THE NITE BEFORE IS THE WORSE PART