Take the following quiz.
You don't need a pen, pencil, or paper.
1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for Best Actor
and Actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series Winners.
How did you do?
THE LESSON
NONE of us remembers the headliners of yesterday.
There are no second-rate achievers on the above quiz.
They are the best in their fields.
But the applause dies.
Awards tarnish.
Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Now here's another quiz.
See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey! through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult
time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and
special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
6. Name a half dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.
Wasn't that a lot easier?
The lesson?
The people who make a difference in your life aren't the ones
with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards.
They're the ones who care enough to spend personal time and
effort for you.
Take a minute to send this to a friend,
Or do you have to go accept an award?
Brand new 2004 edition of "You know you're a redneck when..."
1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think the "Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took there.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because! your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000.00 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
And last, but not least..
31. Someone tells you that you've got something in your teeth, so you take them out to see what it is!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man in his back yard is trying to fly a kite. He keeps throwing it into the air, where the wind catches it for a few seconds before it comes crashing back down. Watching him from the kitchen window, his wife mutters how men have to be told how to do everything. She opens the window and yells,
"You need more tail."
He shouts back,
"Make up your mind. Last night you told me to go fly a kite."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They finally released the ingredients in Viagra:
3% Vitamin E
2% Aspirin
2% Ibuprofen
1% Vitamin C
5% Spray Starch
87% Fix-A-Flat
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You don't need a pen, pencil, or paper.
1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for Best Actor
and Actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series Winners.
How did you do?
THE LESSON
NONE of us remembers the headliners of yesterday.
There are no second-rate achievers on the above quiz.
They are the best in their fields.
But the applause dies.
Awards tarnish.
Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Now here's another quiz.
See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey! through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult
time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and
special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
6. Name a half dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.
Wasn't that a lot easier?
The lesson?
The people who make a difference in your life aren't the ones
with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards.
They're the ones who care enough to spend personal time and
effort for you.
Take a minute to send this to a friend,
Or do you have to go accept an award?
Brand new 2004 edition of "You know you're a redneck when..."
1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think the "Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took there.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because! your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000.00 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
And last, but not least..
31. Someone tells you that you've got something in your teeth, so you take them out to see what it is!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man in his back yard is trying to fly a kite. He keeps throwing it into the air, where the wind catches it for a few seconds before it comes crashing back down. Watching him from the kitchen window, his wife mutters how men have to be told how to do everything. She opens the window and yells,
"You need more tail."
He shouts back,
"Make up your mind. Last night you told me to go fly a kite."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They finally released the ingredients in Viagra:
3% Vitamin E
2% Aspirin
2% Ibuprofen
1% Vitamin C
5% Spray Starch
87% Fix-A-Flat
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
