Not Fred.
(Sung to the tune of "Oh, My Darlin' Clementine")
In a jailhouse, down in Dixie, fightin' crime and risking life,
Dwelled a sheriff and his buddy, pistol-packing Barney Fife.
Oh, my darin', oh, my darin', oh, my darin' Barney Fife.
He's a deadly crime-stopper, what a copper, Barney Fife.
One day there came a-ridin' two bad men to rob a bank.
But Fife was tricky, a dead-eye dickey. Now they're locked up in the tank.
Oh, my Barney, oh, my Barney, had a jail and couldn't lock it.
Had one bullet for his pistol, had to keep it in his pocket.
***********************************
Barney Rubble: It's like a dream come true. A son. Somebody to carry on the proud name of Rubble. 'Think I'll be a good daddy, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Well you're bound to find something you're good at.
Barney Rubble: [On Fred's first day of being a VP] Well, guess this is it, Mr. Flintstone. Go get'em, big guy.
Fred Flintstone: Hey Barn.
Barney Rubble: Yeah, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Could you spot me a couple bucks for lunch? I'm a little short.
Barney Rubble: You're right, Fred. Nothing's changed.
*******************************
Back to work.
