I found this online.
RESUME
GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976
for driving under the influence of alcohol. I
pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's
license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving
record has been "lost" and is not available.
Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went
AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any
questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas
Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam.
College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C
average. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
* I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my
career in the oil business in Midland,Texas, in
1975.
* I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any
oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly
after I sold all my stock.
* I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer
money.
* With the help of my father and our friends in
the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I
was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS
* I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making Texas the most polluted
state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston
replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city
in America.
* I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to
the tune of billions in borrowed money.
* I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American history.
* With the help of my brother, the governor of
Florida, and my father's appointments to the
Supreme Court, I became President after losing by
over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
enter office with a criminal record.
*I invaded and occupied two countries at a
continuing cost of over one billion dollars per
week.
* I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively
bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
* I shattered the record for the largest annual
deficit in U.S. history.
* I set an economic record for most private
bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
* I set the all-time record for most foreclosures
in a 12-month period.
* I set the all-time record for the biggest drop
in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my
first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs.
* I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are
the richest of any administration in U.S.
history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza
Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
* I set the record for most campaign fund-raising
trips by a U.S. President.
* I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder
for receiving the most corporate campaign
donations.
* My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and
one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided
over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in
U.S. History, Enron.
* My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the
U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
* I have protected my friends at Enron and
Halliburton against investigation or prosecution.
More time and money was spent investigating the
Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent
investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-
offs in history.
* I presided over the biggest energy crisis in
U.S. history and refused to intervene when
corruption involving the oil industry was
revealed. I presided over the highest gasoline
prices in U.S. history.
* I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted
criminals to be awarded government contracts.
* I appointed more convicted criminals to
administration than any President in U.S.
history.
* I created the Ministry of Homeland Security,
the largest bureaucracy in the history of the
United States government.
* I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the
Human Rights Commission.
* I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of
Law.
* I refused to allow inspector's access to
U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby
have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
* I am the first President in history to refuse
United Nations election inspectors (during the
2002 U.S. election).
* I set the record for fewest numbers of press
conferences of any President since the advent of
television.
* I set the all-time record for most days on
vacation in any one year period. After taking off
the entire month of August, I presided over the
worst security failure in U.S. history.
* I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after
the World Trade Center attacks and less than a
year later made the U.S. the most hated country
in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in
world history.
* I have set the all-time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record
for protests against any person in the history of
mankind.
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the
military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did
so against the will of the United Nations, the
majority of U.S. citizens, and the world
community.
* I have cut health care benefits for war
veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for
active duty troops and their families -- in
wartime.
* In my State of the Union Address, I lied about
our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed
the lies on our British friends.
* I am the first President in history to have a
majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as
the biggest threat to world peace and security.
* I am supporting development of a
nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
* I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to
bring Osama Bin Laden [sic] to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are
now in my father's library, sealed and
unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or
my Vice President, attended regarding public
energy policy are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.
RESUME
GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976
for driving under the influence of alcohol. I
pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's
license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving
record has been "lost" and is not available.
Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went
AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any
questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas
Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam.
College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C
average. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
* I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my
career in the oil business in Midland,Texas, in
1975.
* I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any
oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly
after I sold all my stock.
* I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer
money.
* With the help of my father and our friends in
the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I
was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS
* I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making Texas the most polluted
state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston
replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city
in America.
* I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to
the tune of billions in borrowed money.
* I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American history.
* With the help of my brother, the governor of
Florida, and my father's appointments to the
Supreme Court, I became President after losing by
over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
enter office with a criminal record.
*I invaded and occupied two countries at a
continuing cost of over one billion dollars per
week.
* I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively
bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
* I shattered the record for the largest annual
deficit in U.S. history.
* I set an economic record for most private
bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
* I set the all-time record for most foreclosures
in a 12-month period.
* I set the all-time record for the biggest drop
in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my
first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs.
* I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are
the richest of any administration in U.S.
history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza
Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
* I set the record for most campaign fund-raising
trips by a U.S. President.
* I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder
for receiving the most corporate campaign
donations.
* My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and
one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided
over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in
U.S. History, Enron.
* My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the
U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
* I have protected my friends at Enron and
Halliburton against investigation or prosecution.
More time and money was spent investigating the
Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent
investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-
offs in history.
* I presided over the biggest energy crisis in
U.S. history and refused to intervene when
corruption involving the oil industry was
revealed. I presided over the highest gasoline
prices in U.S. history.
* I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted
criminals to be awarded government contracts.
* I appointed more convicted criminals to
administration than any President in U.S.
history.
* I created the Ministry of Homeland Security,
the largest bureaucracy in the history of the
United States government.
* I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the
Human Rights Commission.
* I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of
Law.
* I refused to allow inspector's access to
U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby
have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
* I am the first President in history to refuse
United Nations election inspectors (during the
2002 U.S. election).
* I set the record for fewest numbers of press
conferences of any President since the advent of
television.
* I set the all-time record for most days on
vacation in any one year period. After taking off
the entire month of August, I presided over the
worst security failure in U.S. history.
* I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after
the World Trade Center attacks and less than a
year later made the U.S. the most hated country
in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in
world history.
* I have set the all-time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record
for protests against any person in the history of
mankind.
* I am the first President in U.S. history to
order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the
military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did
so against the will of the United Nations, the
majority of U.S. citizens, and the world
community.
* I have cut health care benefits for war
veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for
active duty troops and their families -- in
wartime.
* In my State of the Union Address, I lied about
our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed
the lies on our British friends.
* I am the first President in history to have a
majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as
the biggest threat to world peace and security.
* I am supporting development of a
nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
* I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to
bring Osama Bin Laden [sic] to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are
now in my father's library, sealed and
unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or
my Vice President, attended regarding public
energy policy are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.
