Joke: I want a divorce

Snafu

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:142smilie
 

#cruncher

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The joke Joker told a while back about the girl inviting her boyfriend over to watch Netflex; and then Jack about the lady get a facelift were probably the best 2 jokes I've ever heard. I still catch myself laughing at them.
 

MadJack

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The joke Joker told a while back about the girl inviting her boyfriend over to watch Netflex; and then Jack about the lady get a facelift were probably the best 2 jokes I've ever heard. I still catch myself laughing at them.

I?d like to hear it myself. I don?t remember.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

#cruncher

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By Joker

By Joker

My girlfriend invited me to her house to watch Netflix.
She says ?Stay here, I have to do laundry really quickly.?
Out of nowhere, her sexy sister comes in and sits by me.
She asks ?Do you want to have sex before she gets back??
I got up and went straight to my car.
My girlfriend was outside the door and hugged me, and said ?I knew I could trust you.?
Moral of the story: always leave your condoms in the car.


:mj07:
 

#cruncher

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By Jack

By Jack

I'm still laughing at these jokes!

Face lift
A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday.
She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.
On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around.
As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you
don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35," was the reply.
"I'm actually 47," the woman said, feeling really happy.
After that she went into McDonalds for lunch and asked the order
taker the same question. He replied, "Oh, you look about 29."
"I am actually 47!" she said, feeling really good.
While standing at the bus stop she asked an old man the same question.
He replied, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I
was young there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my
hand up your skirt I will be able to tell your exact age."
There was no one around, so the woman said, "What the hell?" and let
him slip his hand up her skirt.
After feeling around for a while, the old man said, "OK, You are 47."
Stunned, the woman said, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old man replied, "I was behind you in line at McDonalds."

:142smilie
 

MadJack

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I'm still laughing at these jokes!

Face lift
A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday.
She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.
On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around.
As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you
don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35," was the reply.
"I'm actually 47," the woman said, feeling really happy.
After that she went into McDonalds for lunch and asked the order
taker the same question. He replied, "Oh, you look about 29."
"I am actually 47!" she said, feeling really good.
While standing at the bus stop she asked an old man the same question.
He replied, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I
was young there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my
hand up your skirt I will be able to tell your exact age."
There was no one around, so the woman said, "What the hell?" and let
him slip his hand up her skirt.
After feeling around for a while, the old man said, "OK, You are 47."
Stunned, the woman said, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old man replied, "I was behind you in line at McDonalds."

:142smilie

Mine is a joke, Joker's is a life lesson. :mj07:
 

The Joker

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<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/uivbBu1pXRg" title="YouTube video player" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

:142smilie

Every once in a while this pops up in my "recommended" on YouTube and I will watch it every time. :mj07::mj07:
 

MadJack

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