(crocs) Interesting Reaction
BOYS LET ME BEGIN BY TELLING THE MEMBERS HERE AT THE xxx BEANTOWNJIM IS A HAPPILY MARRIED HETEROSEXUEL MALE.NOW THAT BEING SAID LAST WEEK I HAD A CASE OD ATHLETES FEET SO MY LOVELY WIFE SAID IT WAS FROM WALKING AROUND THE Y.M.C.A WITHOUT BEACH SHOES ON AND GETTING CHAPPED FEET FROM THE STEAM ROOM.I SAID O.K. DEAR AND SHE BOUGHT ME A PAIR OF (CROCS) BOYS I HAVE TO TELL YOU THESE CROCS ARE F-G MAGNETS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY REALLY TESTED MY MANHOOD.
FIRST OFF I WALKED INTO THE HOME DEPOT THIS MORNING NOT KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT WEARING FLIP FLOPS I ALWAYS THOUGHT THEY WERE GAY SO BOYS OBVIOUSLY THIS WAS MY FIRST PAIR OF CROCS.I FELT WEIRD RIGHT FROM THE START I DIDNT HAVE ON SOCKS ANYWAY I AM IN THE HOME DEPOT IN THE LUMBER SECTION PICKING UP 4 10 FOOT 4X6'S SURE THEY ARE A LITTLE HEAVY.THE NEXT THING I KNEW I HAD A GUY OVER THERE ASKING ME IF I NEEDED ANY HELP I THOUGHT WHAT THE F-CK I HAVE BEEN COMING TO HOME DEPOT FOR 15 YEARS AND NEVER ONCE HAS ANYBODY OFFERED TO HELP ME.I THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE THEN I LOOKED AT THE GUY AGAIN AND GOT MY ANSWER HE HAD ON A PAIR OF CROCS ALSO OBVIOUSLY A F-G.I SAID LISTEN PAL I AM ALL SET THANK YOU I WAS INCHES AWAY FROM TAKING A SWING AT THE F-CKING GUY.THIS HAPPENED AT 8.30 THIS MORNING.
ROUND 2 NEXT STOP I WENT TO THE YMCA AGAIN WEARING MY CROCS THEY ARE GREAT SHOES YOU CAN WEAR THEN ANYWHERE I NEVER TOOK THEM OFF THE WHOLE TIME I WAS AT THE Y.O.K. HERES THE NEGATIVE PART AGAIN IN MY 25 YEARS AS A YMCA MEMBER I THINK MAYBE ONCE SOMEBODY HAS OFFERED TO SPOT ME WHILE I BENCH PRESS.TODAY I HAD TWO 45 AND A 25 ON THE BAR THATS 185 BENCH PRESS PRETTY GOOD FOR A GUY MY AGE.THE NEXT THING I KNEW A GUY COMES UP TO ME HE LOOKED LIKE A STRAIGHT GUY BUT I COULDNT BE CERTAIN HE ASKED ME IF I NEEDED A SPOT WHY THE F-CK WOULD A TOTAL STRANGER ASK ME IF I NEEDED A SPOT I HAVE NEVER SPOTTED ANYBODY IN MY LIFE UNLESS THEY ASKED.WHAT THE F-CK DID THE GUY WANT ME TO LOOK UP HIS SHORTS I REALLY THINK THE (CROCS) GIVE F-GS AN OPEN INVITATION TO TALK TO YOU.BOYS IT DOESNT END THERE AFTER THE WEIGHT ROOM AT THE BRIGHTON YMCA WILHEIM YOU MUST KNOW THE BRIGHTON YMCA I WENT FOR A SWIN AT THE END OF THE POOL THEY HAVE A WHIRLPOOL COED ABOUT 10 FEET CIRCULAR THAT SEATS 6 PEOPLE COMFORTABLY.BOYS I AM NOT KIDDING THIS IS REALLY F-CKED UP IT HAS TO BE THE CROCS I AM SITTING IN THE WHIRLPOOL ALL BY MYSELF I FELT GREAT THEN I SEE THIS GUY COMING TOWARDS ME AND YOU GUESSED IT HE HAS ON ONE OF THOSE SWIMMERS BATHING SUITS YOU KNOW THE F-CKING BIKINI ONES THE F-GS WEAR I SAID OH F-CK HERE WE GO I AM GOING TO COLD **** THIS F-CKING GUY.BOYS I KID YOU NOT I AM SITTING ON THE FAR SIDE THIS GUY HAD 5 SEATS TO CHOOSE FROM WHERE HE WOULD HAVE BEEN FAR AWAY FROM ME AND YOU GUESSED IT HE SITS DOWN IN THE SEAT RIGHT NEXT TO ME HERE WE ARE TWO GUYS IN A WHIRLPOOL SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER I SAT THERE FOR ABOUT 25 SECONDS THEN I THOUGHT WHAT HAPPENS IF SOMEBODY FROM THE IRISH SOCIAL CLUB SEES ME SITTING IN A WHIRLPOOL WITH A F-G RIGHT NEXT TO ME. BOYS I SOMEWHAT LOST IT I JUST CALMY SAT UP AND STEARED AT THE GUY AND SAID HEY LISTEN PAL I AM NOT A F-G AND WALKED AWAY THE GUY LOOKED AT ME LIKE I HAD TWO HEADS HE DIDNT KNOW WHAT THE F-CK TO SAY.BOYS I LEFT THE YMCA AS FAST AS I COULD SO THE GUY WOULDNT REPORT ME.BOYS I TOLD MY WIFE WHAT HAPPENED AND SHE JUST SAID IT WAS A COINCIDENCE I TOLD HER IT WAS THE CROCS.
I WOULD RATHER SUFFER THROUGH ATHLETES FEET THAN EVER WEAR A PAIR OF CROCS AGAIN CROCS ARE FOR F-GS END OF STORY BOYS YOU WILL NEVER SEE BEANTOWNJIM IN A PAIR OF CROCS AGAIN
NOW I KNOW WHY JOHNNY KNOCKDOWN HAS A SIGN RIGHT ON THE WALL WHEN YOU WALK INTO THE IRISH SOCIAL CLUB
ABOSOLUTLY NO TANK TOPS OR SANDELS (I'LL DRINK TO THAT JOHNNY)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(YOU BIG f-g) ITS A MOUSE
BOYS YOUR GOOD BUDDY BEANTOWNJIM IS IN A BIG JAMB I HAVE THIS TENANT OF MINE COMPLAINING HE HAS MICE THE F-CKING GUY IS 6 FT 3 AND HE WEIGHS EASILY 275 AND HE IS WHINING ON THE PHONE ABOUT THE LITTLE MOUSE GETTING INTO HIS BEEDS I GUESS THE F-G MAKES NECKLACES FOR WOMEN.BOYS I HAVE 3 OTHER TENANTS IN THE BUILDING AND NOBODY ELSE IS COMPLAINING ABOUT MICE HE IS NOW THREATENING TO GO TO THE BUILDING INSPECTORS.I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING I SPENT 50 DOLLARS LAST WEEK ON A GADGETT THAT IS SUPPOSED TO LET OUT A SONIC SOUND THAT DRIVES MICE CRAZY HE IS CLAIMING THAT ISNT WORKING,I HAVE GIVEN HIM PACKETS OF MICE POISEN,I HAVE GIVEN HIM MANY GLUE TRAPS NOW HE CLAIMS NOTHING IS WORKING.I AM ABOUT TO PUNCH THE F-CKING F AG RIGHT IN THE FACE. I KNOW HE IS GAY BECAUSE HE HAS A PICTURE OF THE OLD TOM SELLECK ON HIS WALL AND A RICHARD SIMMONS WORK OUT VIDEO WHAT THE F-CK ELSE DO I HAVE TO SAY.
HELP BOYS I HAVE TO GET THIS GUY OFF MY BACK I NEED SOMETHING THAT WILL KILL MICE RIGHT WAYA BEFORE HE CALLS THE BUILDING INSPECTOR AND I AM COOKED THEY WILL FIND OTHER PROBLEMS IN HIS APARTMENT AND THE BUILDING THEY ALWAYS DO.
I FORGOT TO MENTION THIS GUY IS 37 YEARS OLD AND ON THE SECTION 8 PROGRAM HIS RENT IS PAID BY THE GOVERNMENT UNBELIEVABLE IF YOU SAW THE GUY YOU WOULD THINK HE WAS THE STARTING NOSE GAURD FOR THE PATRIOTS NOT SOME BIG F-G LIVING OFF THE GOVERNMENT.HE MUST HAVE A DOCTORS NOTE SAYING HE IS CRAZY THIS IS HOW YOU GET A VOUCHER FOR SECTION 8.
HE CALLS ME 4 TIMES A WEEK TO TELL ME THE MICE ARE STILL THERE WHAT THE F-CK I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING EXCEPT BURNING DOWN THE BUILDING AND EVEN THAT HAS CROSSED MY MIND.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joe Biden
I KNOW THIS F-CKING USED CAR SALESMAN SOLD ME A 1988 FORD BRONCO THAT BROKE DOWN AFTER TWO YEARS.EVERYTIME I SEE HIS FACE I SWEAR TO GOD ALL I CAN THINK IS HIM SAYING TO ME JIM YOU MADE A GREAT DEAL AND I STAND BEHIND MY VEHICLES.AND BANG I NEVER SAW THE GUY AGAIN AND MY CAR BROKE DOWN THE LAST I HEARD HE WENT INTO POLITICS.JOE BIDEN IS A WIND BAG AND TO TOP IT OFF THE F-CKING GUY IS BALD.I DONT TRUST BALD POLITICIANS ABE LINCOLN F-CKED US OVER AND CORRECT ME IF I AM WRONG WASNT HE THE LAST BALD PRESIDENT.
IF YOUR GOING TO BE MY VICE PRESIDENT YOU BETTER HAVE A PRETTY GOOD HEAD OF HAIR.
JOE BIDEN IF YOU ARE LISTENING MY 1988 FORD BRONCO THAT YOU STOOD BEHIND BROKE DOWN I HAD TO HAVE IT BURNED FOR THE INSURANCE MONEY YOU OWE ME 8 GRAND JOE BIDEN.
BOYS LET ME BEGIN BY TELLING THE MEMBERS HERE AT THE xxx BEANTOWNJIM IS A HAPPILY MARRIED HETEROSEXUEL MALE.NOW THAT BEING SAID LAST WEEK I HAD A CASE OD ATHLETES FEET SO MY LOVELY WIFE SAID IT WAS FROM WALKING AROUND THE Y.M.C.A WITHOUT BEACH SHOES ON AND GETTING CHAPPED FEET FROM THE STEAM ROOM.I SAID O.K. DEAR AND SHE BOUGHT ME A PAIR OF (CROCS) BOYS I HAVE TO TELL YOU THESE CROCS ARE F-G MAGNETS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY REALLY TESTED MY MANHOOD.
FIRST OFF I WALKED INTO THE HOME DEPOT THIS MORNING NOT KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT WEARING FLIP FLOPS I ALWAYS THOUGHT THEY WERE GAY SO BOYS OBVIOUSLY THIS WAS MY FIRST PAIR OF CROCS.I FELT WEIRD RIGHT FROM THE START I DIDNT HAVE ON SOCKS ANYWAY I AM IN THE HOME DEPOT IN THE LUMBER SECTION PICKING UP 4 10 FOOT 4X6'S SURE THEY ARE A LITTLE HEAVY.THE NEXT THING I KNEW I HAD A GUY OVER THERE ASKING ME IF I NEEDED ANY HELP I THOUGHT WHAT THE F-CK I HAVE BEEN COMING TO HOME DEPOT FOR 15 YEARS AND NEVER ONCE HAS ANYBODY OFFERED TO HELP ME.I THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE THEN I LOOKED AT THE GUY AGAIN AND GOT MY ANSWER HE HAD ON A PAIR OF CROCS ALSO OBVIOUSLY A F-G.I SAID LISTEN PAL I AM ALL SET THANK YOU I WAS INCHES AWAY FROM TAKING A SWING AT THE F-CKING GUY.THIS HAPPENED AT 8.30 THIS MORNING.
ROUND 2 NEXT STOP I WENT TO THE YMCA AGAIN WEARING MY CROCS THEY ARE GREAT SHOES YOU CAN WEAR THEN ANYWHERE I NEVER TOOK THEM OFF THE WHOLE TIME I WAS AT THE Y.O.K. HERES THE NEGATIVE PART AGAIN IN MY 25 YEARS AS A YMCA MEMBER I THINK MAYBE ONCE SOMEBODY HAS OFFERED TO SPOT ME WHILE I BENCH PRESS.TODAY I HAD TWO 45 AND A 25 ON THE BAR THATS 185 BENCH PRESS PRETTY GOOD FOR A GUY MY AGE.THE NEXT THING I KNEW A GUY COMES UP TO ME HE LOOKED LIKE A STRAIGHT GUY BUT I COULDNT BE CERTAIN HE ASKED ME IF I NEEDED A SPOT WHY THE F-CK WOULD A TOTAL STRANGER ASK ME IF I NEEDED A SPOT I HAVE NEVER SPOTTED ANYBODY IN MY LIFE UNLESS THEY ASKED.WHAT THE F-CK DID THE GUY WANT ME TO LOOK UP HIS SHORTS I REALLY THINK THE (CROCS) GIVE F-GS AN OPEN INVITATION TO TALK TO YOU.BOYS IT DOESNT END THERE AFTER THE WEIGHT ROOM AT THE BRIGHTON YMCA WILHEIM YOU MUST KNOW THE BRIGHTON YMCA I WENT FOR A SWIN AT THE END OF THE POOL THEY HAVE A WHIRLPOOL COED ABOUT 10 FEET CIRCULAR THAT SEATS 6 PEOPLE COMFORTABLY.BOYS I AM NOT KIDDING THIS IS REALLY F-CKED UP IT HAS TO BE THE CROCS I AM SITTING IN THE WHIRLPOOL ALL BY MYSELF I FELT GREAT THEN I SEE THIS GUY COMING TOWARDS ME AND YOU GUESSED IT HE HAS ON ONE OF THOSE SWIMMERS BATHING SUITS YOU KNOW THE F-CKING BIKINI ONES THE F-GS WEAR I SAID OH F-CK HERE WE GO I AM GOING TO COLD **** THIS F-CKING GUY.BOYS I KID YOU NOT I AM SITTING ON THE FAR SIDE THIS GUY HAD 5 SEATS TO CHOOSE FROM WHERE HE WOULD HAVE BEEN FAR AWAY FROM ME AND YOU GUESSED IT HE SITS DOWN IN THE SEAT RIGHT NEXT TO ME HERE WE ARE TWO GUYS IN A WHIRLPOOL SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER I SAT THERE FOR ABOUT 25 SECONDS THEN I THOUGHT WHAT HAPPENS IF SOMEBODY FROM THE IRISH SOCIAL CLUB SEES ME SITTING IN A WHIRLPOOL WITH A F-G RIGHT NEXT TO ME. BOYS I SOMEWHAT LOST IT I JUST CALMY SAT UP AND STEARED AT THE GUY AND SAID HEY LISTEN PAL I AM NOT A F-G AND WALKED AWAY THE GUY LOOKED AT ME LIKE I HAD TWO HEADS HE DIDNT KNOW WHAT THE F-CK TO SAY.BOYS I LEFT THE YMCA AS FAST AS I COULD SO THE GUY WOULDNT REPORT ME.BOYS I TOLD MY WIFE WHAT HAPPENED AND SHE JUST SAID IT WAS A COINCIDENCE I TOLD HER IT WAS THE CROCS.
I WOULD RATHER SUFFER THROUGH ATHLETES FEET THAN EVER WEAR A PAIR OF CROCS AGAIN CROCS ARE FOR F-GS END OF STORY BOYS YOU WILL NEVER SEE BEANTOWNJIM IN A PAIR OF CROCS AGAIN
NOW I KNOW WHY JOHNNY KNOCKDOWN HAS A SIGN RIGHT ON THE WALL WHEN YOU WALK INTO THE IRISH SOCIAL CLUB
ABOSOLUTLY NO TANK TOPS OR SANDELS (I'LL DRINK TO THAT JOHNNY)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(YOU BIG f-g) ITS A MOUSE
BOYS YOUR GOOD BUDDY BEANTOWNJIM IS IN A BIG JAMB I HAVE THIS TENANT OF MINE COMPLAINING HE HAS MICE THE F-CKING GUY IS 6 FT 3 AND HE WEIGHS EASILY 275 AND HE IS WHINING ON THE PHONE ABOUT THE LITTLE MOUSE GETTING INTO HIS BEEDS I GUESS THE F-G MAKES NECKLACES FOR WOMEN.BOYS I HAVE 3 OTHER TENANTS IN THE BUILDING AND NOBODY ELSE IS COMPLAINING ABOUT MICE HE IS NOW THREATENING TO GO TO THE BUILDING INSPECTORS.I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING I SPENT 50 DOLLARS LAST WEEK ON A GADGETT THAT IS SUPPOSED TO LET OUT A SONIC SOUND THAT DRIVES MICE CRAZY HE IS CLAIMING THAT ISNT WORKING,I HAVE GIVEN HIM PACKETS OF MICE POISEN,I HAVE GIVEN HIM MANY GLUE TRAPS NOW HE CLAIMS NOTHING IS WORKING.I AM ABOUT TO PUNCH THE F-CKING F AG RIGHT IN THE FACE. I KNOW HE IS GAY BECAUSE HE HAS A PICTURE OF THE OLD TOM SELLECK ON HIS WALL AND A RICHARD SIMMONS WORK OUT VIDEO WHAT THE F-CK ELSE DO I HAVE TO SAY.
HELP BOYS I HAVE TO GET THIS GUY OFF MY BACK I NEED SOMETHING THAT WILL KILL MICE RIGHT WAYA BEFORE HE CALLS THE BUILDING INSPECTOR AND I AM COOKED THEY WILL FIND OTHER PROBLEMS IN HIS APARTMENT AND THE BUILDING THEY ALWAYS DO.
I FORGOT TO MENTION THIS GUY IS 37 YEARS OLD AND ON THE SECTION 8 PROGRAM HIS RENT IS PAID BY THE GOVERNMENT UNBELIEVABLE IF YOU SAW THE GUY YOU WOULD THINK HE WAS THE STARTING NOSE GAURD FOR THE PATRIOTS NOT SOME BIG F-G LIVING OFF THE GOVERNMENT.HE MUST HAVE A DOCTORS NOTE SAYING HE IS CRAZY THIS IS HOW YOU GET A VOUCHER FOR SECTION 8.
HE CALLS ME 4 TIMES A WEEK TO TELL ME THE MICE ARE STILL THERE WHAT THE F-CK I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING EXCEPT BURNING DOWN THE BUILDING AND EVEN THAT HAS CROSSED MY MIND.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joe Biden
I KNOW THIS F-CKING USED CAR SALESMAN SOLD ME A 1988 FORD BRONCO THAT BROKE DOWN AFTER TWO YEARS.EVERYTIME I SEE HIS FACE I SWEAR TO GOD ALL I CAN THINK IS HIM SAYING TO ME JIM YOU MADE A GREAT DEAL AND I STAND BEHIND MY VEHICLES.AND BANG I NEVER SAW THE GUY AGAIN AND MY CAR BROKE DOWN THE LAST I HEARD HE WENT INTO POLITICS.JOE BIDEN IS A WIND BAG AND TO TOP IT OFF THE F-CKING GUY IS BALD.I DONT TRUST BALD POLITICIANS ABE LINCOLN F-CKED US OVER AND CORRECT ME IF I AM WRONG WASNT HE THE LAST BALD PRESIDENT.
IF YOUR GOING TO BE MY VICE PRESIDENT YOU BETTER HAVE A PRETTY GOOD HEAD OF HAIR.
JOE BIDEN IF YOU ARE LISTENING MY 1988 FORD BRONCO THAT YOU STOOD BEHIND BROKE DOWN I HAD TO HAVE IT BURNED FOR THE INSURANCE MONEY YOU OWE ME 8 GRAND JOE BIDEN.
