This GOP is one sorry party, me included
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
By Reg Henry, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
The following confession may explain a few things. Until now I have never contemplated visiting a psychiatrist. It didn't seem necessary as long as bartenders were still plying their trade.
What has finally unhinged me is my Republican voter registration. It has become a source of acute embarrassment.
In the past, I was merely embarrassed. This was mostly during the administration of the last president, He Who Must Not Be Named, according to the dictates of right-wing political correctness. To do so might remind people that the economy collapsed on his watch and President Barack Obama is not completely to blame.
But, by George, at least he was a cheerful fellow full of nicknames and frat boy sociability even as he was invading countries and pouring the foundation for the deficit.
Affability is more than you can say for any of the Republican presidential candidates today. They are a most unlikable bunch. The Cheshire cat smiled with more sincerity and it had the good form to disappear.
Of course, I am not one of those hard-core Republicans. I am what they disparagingly call a RINO -- Republican In Name Only. The trouble is the word sounds like rhino, an animal much to be admired. It is thick-skinned, unpredictable and intimidating with a giant horn on its snout, which allows it to pop adult beverages. Who wouldn't want to be a rhino -- a Republican Highly Intuitive Not Obtuse?
Maybe this rhino with the skin no longer quite thick enough to ward off embarrassment would feel better by making a further, shocking confession.
Once, at a Pittsburgh Rotary Club luncheon where he was the speaker, I introduced then-Sen. Rick Santorum and said nice things about him. If memory serves, I said that while the Post-Gazette's editorial page often disagreed with his views, we admired his intelligence and grasp of the issues. Your Honor, I do not know what possessed me.
Of course, he does grasp the issues -- he grasps them in a vise-like grip and throttles any sense out of them. As for his intelligence, by the common IQ measure known as the Rick Perry Standard, he is a genius.
Alas, that does not say much. To be precise, it says that if brains were dynamite, Mr. Santorum would not have enough to blow his hat off, but the explosion might ruffle his hair. To my shame, I should have told the Rotary Club that. There's nothing lower than misleading Rotarians.
The Santorum candidacy is a phenomenon you see but do not quite believe. Really? This guy could be president?
Yes, he already has won the support of evangelicals who have Bibles that apparently condemn health insurance for millions of poor people. (I tell you, some of these Bible translations are getting out of hand.)
Yes, he is the same guy who inspires spontaneous laughter in those Pennsylvanians who cannot forget the judgmental juggernaut, the hypocrisy raised to a high art, the earful of earmarks, the tender loving care of the K Street animals, the punch-me face and attitude. (Other than that, he's not a bad fellah.)
One good thing, though: For too long, Texas, in its big, bragging way, has been foisting prime-grade political dolts on the rest of us, but now Pennsylvania has outgunned Texas with its own highly undesirable candidate.
I must say, however, that Mr. Santorum is looking good in his sweater vest, which imparts a Mister Rogers Neighborhood feel to his campaign, assuming that the neighborhood was cleared of gay people to make for a lovely day. Not to start any rumors, but did His Sanctimoniousness have some cosmetic "work" done to enhance his cuteness? His trademark smirk seems less obvious, leading to my suspicion that he may have undergone a smirk-ectomy.
To be sure, Rick Santorum has real competition: Ron Paul, who wants to be trusted with government so he can abolish much of it; the aforementioned Rick Perry, who might be dangerous if his intellect were larger, but no worries there; and Newt Gingrich, the serial repeater of the words "I do" -- and not just to his brides but to the many crazy ideas seeking to marry his brain.
And, of course, there's Mitt Romney, Mr. Vanilla, who will say he is Mr. Rocky Road to get elected. Unfortunately, he has one big disadvantage: He shows signs of being sane, an attribute useless in the Republican primaries but which just might get him elected in November.
And you wonder why I have serious embarrassment issues? Take it from an old RHINO, the whole Republic Party should join me in getting psychiatric help. Maybe we could get the group rate.
Reg Henry: rhenry@post-gazette.com or 412-263-1668. Read his blog "Reg on Wry" at www.post-gazette.com/regonwry. More articles by this author
First published on January 18, 2012 at 12:00 am
Read more: http://www.postgazette.com/pg/12018/1204172-154-0.stm?cmpid=bcpanel0#ixzz1jqDmMpSY
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
By Reg Henry, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
The following confession may explain a few things. Until now I have never contemplated visiting a psychiatrist. It didn't seem necessary as long as bartenders were still plying their trade.
What has finally unhinged me is my Republican voter registration. It has become a source of acute embarrassment.
In the past, I was merely embarrassed. This was mostly during the administration of the last president, He Who Must Not Be Named, according to the dictates of right-wing political correctness. To do so might remind people that the economy collapsed on his watch and President Barack Obama is not completely to blame.
But, by George, at least he was a cheerful fellow full of nicknames and frat boy sociability even as he was invading countries and pouring the foundation for the deficit.
Affability is more than you can say for any of the Republican presidential candidates today. They are a most unlikable bunch. The Cheshire cat smiled with more sincerity and it had the good form to disappear.
Of course, I am not one of those hard-core Republicans. I am what they disparagingly call a RINO -- Republican In Name Only. The trouble is the word sounds like rhino, an animal much to be admired. It is thick-skinned, unpredictable and intimidating with a giant horn on its snout, which allows it to pop adult beverages. Who wouldn't want to be a rhino -- a Republican Highly Intuitive Not Obtuse?
Maybe this rhino with the skin no longer quite thick enough to ward off embarrassment would feel better by making a further, shocking confession.
Once, at a Pittsburgh Rotary Club luncheon where he was the speaker, I introduced then-Sen. Rick Santorum and said nice things about him. If memory serves, I said that while the Post-Gazette's editorial page often disagreed with his views, we admired his intelligence and grasp of the issues. Your Honor, I do not know what possessed me.
Of course, he does grasp the issues -- he grasps them in a vise-like grip and throttles any sense out of them. As for his intelligence, by the common IQ measure known as the Rick Perry Standard, he is a genius.
Alas, that does not say much. To be precise, it says that if brains were dynamite, Mr. Santorum would not have enough to blow his hat off, but the explosion might ruffle his hair. To my shame, I should have told the Rotary Club that. There's nothing lower than misleading Rotarians.
The Santorum candidacy is a phenomenon you see but do not quite believe. Really? This guy could be president?
Yes, he already has won the support of evangelicals who have Bibles that apparently condemn health insurance for millions of poor people. (I tell you, some of these Bible translations are getting out of hand.)
Yes, he is the same guy who inspires spontaneous laughter in those Pennsylvanians who cannot forget the judgmental juggernaut, the hypocrisy raised to a high art, the earful of earmarks, the tender loving care of the K Street animals, the punch-me face and attitude. (Other than that, he's not a bad fellah.)
One good thing, though: For too long, Texas, in its big, bragging way, has been foisting prime-grade political dolts on the rest of us, but now Pennsylvania has outgunned Texas with its own highly undesirable candidate.
I must say, however, that Mr. Santorum is looking good in his sweater vest, which imparts a Mister Rogers Neighborhood feel to his campaign, assuming that the neighborhood was cleared of gay people to make for a lovely day. Not to start any rumors, but did His Sanctimoniousness have some cosmetic "work" done to enhance his cuteness? His trademark smirk seems less obvious, leading to my suspicion that he may have undergone a smirk-ectomy.
To be sure, Rick Santorum has real competition: Ron Paul, who wants to be trusted with government so he can abolish much of it; the aforementioned Rick Perry, who might be dangerous if his intellect were larger, but no worries there; and Newt Gingrich, the serial repeater of the words "I do" -- and not just to his brides but to the many crazy ideas seeking to marry his brain.
And, of course, there's Mitt Romney, Mr. Vanilla, who will say he is Mr. Rocky Road to get elected. Unfortunately, he has one big disadvantage: He shows signs of being sane, an attribute useless in the Republican primaries but which just might get him elected in November.
And you wonder why I have serious embarrassment issues? Take it from an old RHINO, the whole Republic Party should join me in getting psychiatric help. Maybe we could get the group rate.
Reg Henry: rhenry@post-gazette.com or 412-263-1668. Read his blog "Reg on Wry" at www.post-gazette.com/regonwry. More articles by this author
First published on January 18, 2012 at 12:00 am
Read more: http://www.postgazette.com/pg/12018/1204172-154-0.stm?cmpid=bcpanel0#ixzz1jqDmMpSY
