Two Minute Management Course

Chopsticks

Fish Head
Forum Member
Feb 15, 2002
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Arlington, TX (But a Missourian at heart)
> Lesson One

>

> An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.

>

> A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and

do

> nothing?"

>

> The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."

>

> So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.

>

> All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

>

> Management Lesson - To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting

> very, very high up.

>

> Lesson Two

>

> A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to

the

> top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

>

> "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.

> "They're packed with nutrients."

>

> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him

enough

> strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after

eating

> some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth

night,

> the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

>

> He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

>

> Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't

keep

> you there.

>

> Lesson Three

>

> A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird

> froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

>

> While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As

> the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize

how

> warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all

warm

> and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

>

> A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following

the

> sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and

promptly

> dug him out and ate him.

>

> Management Lesson -

> (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

> (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

> (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

>

> This ends your two minute management course.
 

caught up

Registered User
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Jan 7, 2004
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MA
two was sounding like the lesson was... eat shit and die. but, thats the world over, not jus management i guess.
 
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