this is a truer story. this is classic me
My wife has convinced me to get more healthy this year. Havent been to dr in 10 years so its about time.
So the appointmen=t is made for yesterday.
So two weeks ago, I go into this Kroger grocery store and at the pharmacy they have a free blood pressure machine.
I figure i will get a jump on my health.
I sit down and it goes thru the tighteneing of arm and all that.
Then it registers 189 over 120 which by the meter shows I should have died already. So I figure fawk maybe I moved or something so I take my sweater off and try it again.
Again its off the charts.
So I am thinking oh shit. So for the past two weeks i am not eating any salt, no alchol, no smoking, nothing so I can live a few more days.
I get to the doctors office yesterday. The girl comes in and takes my blood pressure..
its 125 over 88
son of a bitch. So I jump up from the lab table and give the nurse a roundhouse kick to the fqawking head. knocking out all her teeth.
the staff people come rushing in, I pull out a ginzu knife and slice off a ear of one of them, and stick it in my pocket.
They send in cops and thye taser me. as I am flopping on the floor the blood pressure machine is flashing 125. 88 right above my head.
I get a new burst of energy. I kick the one cop in the nuts, jump up . pull my .50 calliber and start shotting.
fawk me what a day
My wife has convinced me to get more healthy this year. Havent been to dr in 10 years so its about time.
So the appointmen=t is made for yesterday.
So two weeks ago, I go into this Kroger grocery store and at the pharmacy they have a free blood pressure machine.
I figure i will get a jump on my health.
I sit down and it goes thru the tighteneing of arm and all that.
Then it registers 189 over 120 which by the meter shows I should have died already. So I figure fawk maybe I moved or something so I take my sweater off and try it again.
Again its off the charts.
So I am thinking oh shit. So for the past two weeks i am not eating any salt, no alchol, no smoking, nothing so I can live a few more days.
I get to the doctors office yesterday. The girl comes in and takes my blood pressure..
its 125 over 88
son of a bitch. So I jump up from the lab table and give the nurse a roundhouse kick to the fqawking head. knocking out all her teeth.
the staff people come rushing in, I pull out a ginzu knife and slice off a ear of one of them, and stick it in my pocket.
They send in cops and thye taser me. as I am flopping on the floor the blood pressure machine is flashing 125. 88 right above my head.
I get a new burst of energy. I kick the one cop in the nuts, jump up . pull my .50 calliber and start shotting.
fawk me what a day
