Ultimate Valentine's Day Gifts

[marine]

Guys, I got one heck of a deal today...

The local Radio station 97.1 up here in PA is having a contest for those of us in the doghouse. Called in an told them my sob story of

In the military, spent the thanksgiving and xmas holidays moving out here from hawaii and had to skimp on xmas and all that jazz, her birthday was around there too, which I got her a card and a small small gift. Now, with valentine's day approaching, and we are expecting our first child on the 17th of the month I figured the kid would come early and I could skip v-day as well. well, the kid aint comin early and I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.
The radio guys were ROLLING with laughter at this one.

So now, tomorrow morning, I get to go down to teh radio station and try and get out of the doghouse by acting like a dog. Its gonna be a contest, the first guy to eat a whole can of dog food wins the prizes...

Roses
chocolates
a weekend spa treatment
dinner for two at a high end restaurant
and a diamond pendant necklace

I have eaten some sick sh*t in my time, but never dog food. Anybody tell me what dog food tastes like and anyone got tips on how to eat really really freakin fast?
I dont plan on eating anything today or tonite at all, just so that i am extremely hungry tomorrow and will eat anything.
any tips for the last minute shoppers???

 

[Bluemound Freak]

Oh man that is hilarious! I wish I had pictures!

 

[marine]

i am sure they will be taking pictures of this one.. . i will post them when it is over with.

 

[loophole]

don't worry marine. it isn't any worse than some of the things the corps gives you to eat out of a can. trust me, i've had both. then again, you're not old enough to have eaten c-rations, are you?

 

[marine]

nope, not old enuff to be issued c-rats. BUT we did find a box of them once in the supply warehouse. Man did they suck!

I just went out and got a can of the doggy stuff. My dogs are eating steak and chicken the rest of their life cuz the stuff i have been feeding them SUCKS!

Although, the second can I chowed down on for speed I scarfed it down in about 17 seconds. Hopefully that will be good enuff to win it.

 

[Chanman]

marine- pretend your in the Philippines and the dog food is Balut

 

[Megami]

good luck to you, marine.

seriously... if you don't win, why couldn't you do all that on a smaller scale?

Buy a box of chocolates, get the kids (if you have them) to stay with a family member/friend for the night, light some candles, make her a bubble bath, put on some music and give a massage? It's a home-made spa-weekend. Then make her breakfast in bed.

Speaking of radio stations doing stunts like this... I saw on "Real TV" how in Austrailia this dude had to eat cow eyeballs, worms, get a bucket of oil dumped on him... and he had to eat something else disgusting I can't think of right now... all that for a pair of tickets to see AC/DC. Now THAT was stupid!

 

[marine]

ah but dost thou forget?
AC/DC is FROM Australia. Its just like someone from seattle trying to get tickets to a nirvana re-union (where kurt comes back from the dead for just one night to play again).

 

[BahamaMama]

Megami has the right idea here Marine..... something done by you and FROM you (even on a much smaller scale), would mean A LOT more than something WON by you

 

[TIME TO MAKE $$$]

spending time with your loved one performing oral on him/her for hours and hours.......

 

[marine]

man what a crock... went down this morning and the three of us did it all separatly. first guy gets it in 3 minutes and 45 secs. then i go and drilled iit. 2 minutes 12 seconds.

then the third guy comes in. total ringer.
short fat guy who is a fast meal eating champ. ****er had his trophy sheet they pulled up.... 5 pound hamburger eaten completely in one sitting, 2 gallons of milk drank in 30 minutes and so on and so on..... he did it in 2:03.
he had 1/4 of his bowl left with 20 seconds to go and then just opened his mouth up and took it all down.
if we had all done it at teh same time i think i woulda pulled it off.... big advantage going last.
UGHHHH!!!! so freaking close!


and TTM... cant do oral... wife is having contractions and the kid will be out in a day or two now.

 

[Megami]

TTMM --- just curious, but is every post with you about sex or posting girls in every bent-over position possibe? Just wondering. I think I'm going to start posting pictures of naked men in various positions... bent over and giving that 'come hither' smile while straddling a motorcycle backwards. Just to even the playing field a bit.


Marine -- I'm sure your wife is realistic enough to know that finances are a little tight right now with the baby coming, and won't hold it against you that you really can't ice her out right now. Seriously though, if she's pregnant, I am almost 1000% positive that she will thoroughly appreciate and enjoy a night off her feet, a good massage, and lots of *truthful* and *heartfelt* words coming from you. Sorry you lost your contest.

 

[SixFive]

and TTM... cant do oral... wife is having contractions and the kid will be out in a day or two now.

lmmfao, a mental picture came to mind of water breaking and getting splashed and soaked with it while down there.

 

[Chanman]

To quote Redd Foxx: "The only thing bad about oral sex is the view." Howabout that Fellas? That's one ugly sumbiatch. "Looks like Sammy with his eye out."

 

[marine]

Megami, she is a massage therapist by trade... so for me to give her a massage just aint up to snuff.

but, contractions are started up today again so it looks as if i may be able to skip the whole v-day thing all together and spend it in the delivery room with a beautiful, adorable, crying, kicking, screaming infant in my arms.

 

[TIME TO MAKE $$$]

skip the whole v-day thing all together and spend it in the delivery room with a beautiful, adorable, crying, kicking, screaming infant in my arms.

That is the best gift anyone could have....

Cheers Marine!!

Keep us updated!

 

[TIME TO MAKE $$$]

TTMM --- just curious, but is every post with you about sex or posting girls in every bent-over position possibe? Just wondering.

Other than my hadicapping selections...Yes!




Gamblers love women, money, and women!



HELLAH10, help me out here, who is the rapper that has that saying from one of his songs????

 

[Megami]

HELLAH10, help me out here, who is the rapper that has that saying from one of his songs????

"Your dough is my dough, and my dough is my dough."
-Smilez & Southstar

I personally like that one.

Gamblers love women, money, and women!

In that order? That's a rather large generalization, and one I'd like to see proven at next year's MJ SB party... not a lot of chicks showing up at that gig. Where are all of you MJ posters' ladies?

 

[TIME TO MAKE $$$]

not a lot of chicks showing up at that gig.

I am sure Jack, Fletcher, Kosar, and TJBELL know of a few places where this can be rectified.

 

[MadJack]

That's one ugly sumbiatch. "Looks like Sammy with his eye out

christ! i just spit my drink all over my keyboard when i read that! :lol: