Post here sayings that make you LOL

[Terryray]

I'm sweatin' like a blind lesbian in a fishmarket


I gotta piss so bad, my molars are floating.


You're trying to crap higher than your ass can reach.


I wouldn't s#$% you, you're my favorite turd.


That's slicker than 2 eels f*ckin' in a bucket of snot.


"She's about as smart as a handful of paint."


That went over like a turd in a punch bowl.

 

[Mjolnir]

nuttier than a squirrel turd

 

[yyz]

My dad used to say:

"Bout as bright as a white marble in a black cat's ass!"

"There are more horse's asses in this world, than there are horses."

 

[MadJack]

I'm busier than a one-armed paper hanger with the crabs :0008

 

[MadJack]

I popped a blue-steel hard on a bobcat couldn't scratch.

 

[Agent 0659]

I popped a blue-steel hard on a bobcat couldn't scratch.

:mj07: :mj07: :mj07:

What?:shrug:

 

[VaNurse]

One of my favorites: He's so dumb; if he had a brain he'd take it out and play with it.


I've been hearing a lot of new ones from the boys on Lizard Lick Towing.

• 
  Don't let your mouth talk you right outta life.

• 
  Even a dog knows the difference between being kicked and being stepped on.

• There's two people in a marriage: one's always right and the other's always the husband.

• If you wanna know how country people are doing, don't look at the house, look at the barn.

• No matter how you clean a skunk, he's still gonna stink.

• Make like a baby and head outta this mother.

• Every path has a few puddles.

• There's more than one way to skin a catfish on a Friday night.

• I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others, they are more screwed up than you think.

• Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

• He's about as sharp as a bowling ball.

 

[Handi Capper]

I'm sweatin' like a blind lesbian in a fishmarket .

:mj07: :mj07: :mj07:

 

[Skulnik]

True TV, Lizzard Lick Towing, that guy spews a few every show.

 

[Trampled Underfoot]

PITY REALLY.

 

[jr11]

"Nole is sweating like Ponch at a weiner roast"....

 

[LetsMakeMoney]

umf1 :0008

 

[The Joker]

"Nole is sweating like Ponch at a weiner roast"....

:mj07: :mj07: :mj07: :mj07:

 

[Skulnik]

PITY REALLY.

HEEEEEEEEE HAWWWWWWWWWWWWWW


:0074

 

[lawtchan]

My dad used to say:

"Bout as bright as a white marble in a black cat's ass!"

."

:142smilie :142smilie :142smilie :142smilie :00hour :00hour :mj07: :mj07:

 

[ppabart]

umf1 :0008

:mj07: :mj07: :mj07:

 

[Old School]

"sweatin' like a whore in church."

 

[saint]

All fart and no poo

 

[Captain Crunch]

She was so ugly, they had to tie a pork chop around her neck, so the dogs would play with her.

Saw this on another forum in a discussion on breasts.
Grab em by the ankles, and they all look like sisters.

 

[Betone]

He is happier than a fruit, in boys town.

It is hotter than a whore in a pickle patch.

I am falling apart like a nickle mop.

:0008