Shit

[Eddie Haskell]

Recently, while sitting on the throne contemplating the meaning of life, I began to wonder how many times I have taken a shit during my lifetime. For purposes of this analysis, I assume that I have taken one shit per day for each day on this earth (I have excluded any intra utero releases during the 9 months I was waiting to drop onto the delivery room floor). Obviously, the number is an approximation because it does not include those times when I was constipated or had the runs. Further adjustments would have to be made for sharting and enema usage.

Anywho, I've been on the planet for some 63.5 years and, based upon the above assumption I have taken.............

23,178 shits.

That's a lot of shit.

Further assuming the average shit takes 5 minutes, I have been on the can for 1931.5 hours of over 80 days. That's nearly 3 fucking months of nothing but shitting. Further assuming I live another 20 years, I will have taken over 30,000 shits during my lifetime spending 2539.8 hours on the seat. That's 105.8 days of doing nothing but shitting and wiping my ass. Wow.

As you can tell, I am quite bored today. Well, gotta go (literally).

Eddie

 

[REFLOG]

, I assume that I have taken one shit per day for each day on this earth

So you're just a "regular" guy:rimshot

 

[Eddie Haskell]

Make that 23,179.

Eddie

 

[REFLOG]

Have you done the math on how many miles of toilet paper :shrug:

 

[Eddie Haskell]

Have you done the math on how many miles of toilet paper :shrug:

That's my next project (as well as how many urinations I have taken).

Eddie

 

[saint]

That's my next project (as well as how many urinations I have taken).

Eddie

Eddie, do any particular trips to the porcelain throne stand out to you? Any dumb and dumber moments?

 

[fatdaddycool]

Eddie, do any particular trips to the porcelain throne stand out to you? Any dumb and dumber moments?

Who asks a question like this, seriously? How old are you, seven?
For fucks sake, want to hear a shitty story, here it goes. A racist shithead goes to dental school. The end.

"Do you have any memorable stories about taking a shit Eddie?" holy fuck you need to rinse and spit..............

Hope this helps,
FDC

 

[THE KOD]

Who asks a question like this, seriously? How old are you, seven?
For fucks sake, want to hear a shitty story, here it goes. A racist shithead goes to dental school. The end.

"Do you have any memorable stories about taking a shit Eddie?" holy fuck you need to rinse and spit..............

Hope this helps,
FDC

fats

I try to be tolerant


but come on Eddie is posting about how many lifetime shits he has taken

that seems fair game without being scolded in a post.

the rinse and spit is funny though

maybe you should put the helmet on and jump in the nearest pool


ahhhhhh

you forced me...............

 

[BuddyWright]

Gentlemen, gentlemen let me interject on this subject.....

All of you must have had a moment of down time to have even entered into this kind of discussion and since I think all of you have entered valid points but the subject matter is shit so since you guys are talking about shit it should all end immediately. Thank you

Next thing you know you guys will be talking about waking off and God only knows how many responses you will get from this horny ass crowd...LOL

 

[Sportsaholic]

I knew the shit would start to fly in this Thread......:0003

 

[MadJack]

Make that 23,179.

Eddie

It's probably fair to say 10 pisses a day? If so, that comes to 231,790 pisses. :0008

That's counting beer pissing days that out number the regular pissing days.

Now, let's just say the average piss is 8 ounces so that makes 1,854,320 ounces which comes to 144,869 gallons. Or approximately 7,250 trash cans full of piss.

:0003

 

[THE KOD]

It's probably fair to say 10 pisses a day? If so, that comes to 231,790 pisses. :0008

That's counting beer pissing days that out number the regular pissing days.

Now, let's just say the average piss is 8 ounces so that makes 1,854,320 ounces which comes to 144,869 gallons. Or approximately 7,250 trash cans full of piss.

:0003

this from a guy who has not took a dump on a public toilet in 10 years or longer


wish I could say that

but nature calls at the weirdest times and a public toilet is required.


best public toilet to date................... Panda eateries. They keep them clean for some reason.

I have two shit storys I could relate,....... but fdc would probably go on a tirade

 

[THE KOD]

info



Fletcher, I apologize if I upset you, all I wanted was a little information about Las Vegas. Please don't say that i'm lying about the busy signals, i'll have to check my current phone setting, maybe it is set on the block mode, I don't know. But over the last 4 days or so, your phone has been busy.

Nolan Dalla gave me a little info and Senor Capper gave me a little, but i've always thought that you knew the most, that's why i've been kind of aggressive about trying to reach you. It IS my future, you know. I look forward to meeting you and talking to you in person during the super bowl party.

I do want to advise you of one thing. Please don't carry on like you did here, in front of my friends out in Vegas. 3 of us (including me) are peaceful types, but the other three? Well, I wouldn't be able to guarantee that they wouldn't go nuts. They have very bad tempers and I assure you that you don't want any part of them. I promise not to report your post to them, and right now they see you like I do because i'm the one who tells them what's going on. They don't read this forum and i'm glad they don't because they would be loaded for bear if they did. We'll just keep this between me and you, because I don't want any problems out there. I just want to see what Vegas is all about.

Thanks again and I hope to speak with you soon,


PP

.....................................................................

NUMBER 1 DICK HEAD I HAVE 4 PHONE LINES I RUN A BUSINESS,AND JERI WORKS FROM THE HOUSE AT TIMES

2 THERE IS NO-WAY YOU CALLED 5-6 TIMES AND LINES WERE BUSY.

3 OUT OF TOWN AND CALLS ARE FORWARDING TO ME

4 IF YOU HAVE A BLOCK ON YOU PHONE OR PRIVITE NUMBER IT WILL ALWAYS BE BUSY

5 AM SICK OF YOUR PUNK ASS SHIT AND I WILL BE HERE IF YOU AND YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS WANT TO SIT ME DOWN AND TEACH ME TO ACT LIKE A GENTLEMAN

6 DON'T EVEN CROSS ME WHY YOU ARE AROUND ME BECAUSE TRUST ME I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOUR SMART ASS MOUTH.

7 DO YOUR OWN WORK I AM DONE BEING NICE TO YOUR SMART ASS PUNK MOUTH

fletcher

............................................................


Note to fdc.....

If your going to rant do it like a man. now fletcher could rant

 

[MadJack]

this from a guy who has not took a dump on a public toilet in 10 years or longer

Longer for sure. I'd rather go home.

 

[THE KOD]

damn that kosar was classic.

funny fucker

 

[saint]

Who asks a question like this, seriously? How old are you, seven?
For fucks sake, want to hear a shitty story, here it goes. A racist shithead goes to dental school. The end.

"Do you have any memorable stories about taking a shit Eddie?" holy fuck you need to rinse and spit..............

Hope this helps,
FDC

Do you understand the ridiculousness of the irony when you rip my post for being childish when I am responding to a thread solely posted to detai the number of shits Eddie has taken in his lifetime?

You can't make this shit up. Pun intended.

 

[THE KOD]

Do you understand the ridiculousness of the irony when you rip my post for being childish when I am responding to a thread solely posted to detai the number of shits Eddie has taken in his lifetime?

You can't make this shit up. Pun intended.

:mj07::mj07:

fdc is kinda twisted

 

[The Boys]

I find this thread to be very offensive................ xstop

 

[THE KOD]

I find this thread to be very offensive................ xstop

who gives a shit


I am on vacation time


just fed the cows and chickens


stepped and slipped in a huge cow shit if your interested

 

[REFLOG]

I find this thread to be very offensive................ xstop

Then don't read it